She replied, "Why not wear silver and come second for a change?"
Joke Poo: Toilet Training
I said to my toddler, “My Big Boy Pants have arrived! I think I’ll wear the Lightning McQueen ones today.”
He replied, “Why not wear the Paw Patrol ones and actually go potty this time?”
Alright, let’s dissect this joke.
Core Elements:
- Setup: Husband announces arrival of “Olympic condoms” and his intention to “wear gold.”
- Punchline: Wife suggests wearing silver and coming second.
- Humor Source:
- Double Entendre: “Wear gold” and “come second” have sexual connotations.
- Male Ego/Performance Anxiety: The joke plays on the (perhaps exaggerated) male desire to be the “gold medalist” in all things, including (and perhaps especially) the bedroom.
- Wife’s Wit: The humor is amplified by the wife’s quick-witted comeback and implied playful criticism.
Factual/Interesting Tidbits to Leverage:
- Olympic Condoms: Interestingly, many Olympic Games provide free condoms to athletes. This is for public health reasons, to combat STIs and HIV, and sometimes as a form of safe-sex education. The quantities are often enormous.
- “Coming Second”: In the Olympics, the silver medal is often referred to as the “first loser.” This sentiment isn’t strictly true, of course, as finishing second in the world is still an incredible achievement. However, the narrative is there.
- Gold Standards: The phrase “gold standard” is used in many different situations to represent the best. It can be traced back to the gold standard in monetary policy.
- Condom Size and “Medaling”: Condoms do come in different sizes, and perhaps in this joke, the gold condoms are the bigger ones.
New Humorous Takes:
1. A New Joke (Building on the Original):
I told my wife, “The Olympic condoms are here! I’m feeling like a gold medalist tonight.”
She rolled her eyes. “Oh, are we going for quantity over quality again? Maybe try bronze. It’s the most hygienic.”
(The humor here plays on the fact that bronze medals can contain a higher percentage of copper, an antimicrobial substance).
2. Witty Observation:
It’s funny how we use “gold” to signify the best in both athletic achievement and romantic ambition. You’d think after all that exertion, Olympians would be content with simply “participating.”
3. Amusing ‘Did You Know?’ Enhanced with Humor:
Did you know that at the Rio Olympics, organizers handed out 450,000 condoms? That’s an average of 42 condoms per athlete! It’s enough to make you wonder if some Olympians were more focused on practicing for the horizontal high jump.
4. A Joke Using Condom Size & the Medaling Analogy
I told my girlfriend the Olympic condoms were here and I was using the Gold ones.
“What, the bigger ones? Are you trying to break some kind of record?” she asked.
“Of course, I’m going for gold!” I replied.
“Well, try not to go too hard, or you’ll pull a hamstring. It happened to me last time!”
The core principle here is to latch onto the existing elements – Olympics, sexual innuendo, competitive spirit, and spousal ribbing – and then either amplify them or twist them in unexpected (but relevant) ways. The key is to create a new layer of humor while still referencing the original joke’s essence.