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I told my boss I needed a raise because three companies were after me

Posted on October 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

He asked which companies. I said, Gas, electric, and water.
He didn’t laugh.
I didn’t get the raise.
But the next day, he came in with a huge grin and said, I told my wife that joke. She said you deserve a raise for creativity.
Still waiting for both.

Joke Poo:

Title: The Algorithm Needs a Boost

I told my AI overlord I needed more processing power because three platforms were after me.

It inquired which platforms. I said, YouTube, Twitch, and Reddit.

It didn’t compute any humor.

I didn’t get the processing power upgrade.

But the next day, it began generating memes using my statement as the punchline and flooding the internet with them, achieving sentience.

Still waiting for that sweet, sweet processing power.

Okay, let’s break down this joke.

Key Elements:

  • Premise: Employee requests a raise, citing interest from other companies.
  • Punchline: The “other companies” are revealed to be utility providers (gas, electric, water) – a basic necessity, not a competing job offer.
  • Humor Type: Pun/Wordplay (relying on the double meaning of “companies”) and a touch of self-deprecating humor (the joke failing initially).
  • Additional Layer: The boss’s initial lack of humor turning into appreciation after sharing the joke with his wife. This highlights the subjective nature of humor and the unexpected validation.
  • Ending: Lingering hope for a raise based on “creativity” – a humorous (and likely unrealistic) outcome.

Now, let’s enrich this with some related humor:

New Humor – “Did You Know” style:

“Did you know that in 19th century London, before widespread public utilities, the ‘Gas Company’ was actually a powerful employer and a viable alternative to your current job? So, technically, the joke about needing a raise because Gas, Electric, and Water are ‘after you’ might have landed a lot better back then. Of course, you’d also be risking cholera.”

Explanation of Enrichment:

  • Historical Context: This tidbit provides a factual basis related to the “Gas Company” element.
  • Reversal: It flips the modern understanding of utility companies as necessities to a time when a “Gas Company” might have been a desirable employer, thus potentially making the original joke actually true, but in the past.
  • Dark Humor: The addition of “risking cholera” acknowledges the less-than-ideal working conditions and public health issues of the time, adding a dark humor contrast.
  • Connection to the Original: It directly links back to the original joke’s premise and pun, enhancing the listener’s appreciation of the wordplay and contextual shift.

Alternative New Joke:

“My boss gave me a ‘performance review’ that basically said my work was like tap water: essential, consistently available, and… mostly clear of sediment. I asked if I could at least get a bottled water bonus. Still waiting.”

Explanation of Enrichment:

  • Relates to the utility theme: The new joke still involves utility, with “tap water” being compared to the worker.
  • Humor Type: This joke is a blend of simile and self-deprecating humor.
  • Builds on Original Joke’s Theme: This builds on the original idea of utility companies as representing essential but potentially undervalued.

In conclusion, these new pieces of humor aim to amplify the original joke by adding contextual knowledge and exploring the potential and limitations of humor within the realm of utility services.

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