I found two turds in the toilet when I got home – and I know for a fact that when I left for work there were three.
Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” version of the joke, titled accordingly:
Joke Poo: The Lost Diaper
I’m pretty sure some son-of-a-bitch baby visited my apartment today while I was at work.
I found two clean diapers in the diaper pail when I got home – and I know for a fact that when I left for work there were three used ones.
Alright, let’s break down this joke.
Joke Dissection:
- Core Concept: A scatological scenario where someone has surreptitiously used the narrator’s toilet.
- Humor Style: Dark, observational humor with a twist on expectation. The humor stems from the unexpected specificity – the missing “turd.” It’s absurd and slightly unsettling.
- Key Elements:
- Toilet (the scene of the crime)
- Feces (the subject of the crime)
- The “Son-of-a-bitch” (the implied perpetrator)
- Unexpectedly specific quantity of feces (three down to two)
Comedic Enrichment Attempt:
Idea: A “Did You Know” style observation, building on the specificity aspect.
“Did you know that the Bristol Stool Scale classifies human feces into seven types, ranging from hard, separate lumps (type 1) to entirely liquid (type 7)? Our friend in the original joke experienced a Bristol Stool Scale theft of what was ostensibly a type of either 1, 2, or 3! The real question isn’t just who took a dump, but which dump was embezzled?”
Explanation:
- Connects to Original Joke: Directly refers to the original joke as “Our friend” to acknowledge the connection.
- Leverages Specificity: The Bristol Stool Scale is a specific and somewhat clinical system for categorizing feces, which contrasts hilariously with the crude situation in the original joke. The reference to type 1, 2, or 3 further specifies the specifics of the original joke.
- Adds Absurdity: Using dry, informative language like “Bristol Stool Scale theft” and “embezzled” to describe the situation makes it even more ridiculous.
- Elevates the Humor: It turns the situation into something akin to an art heist or corporate crime, complete with analysis and jargon.
Alternative Idea: A new joke
Why did the landlord evict the mathematician?
Because he kept adjusting the rent equation to account for pi – and then tenants started complaining about inexplicably missing feces!
Explanation:
- Connects to Original Joke: The missing feces aspect.
- Adds Absurdity: Incorporates a mathematical element (pi) and the irrationality of it as a plot point.
- Elevates the Humor: The joke is funnier the more mathematical you know, and the more you know about the original joke.