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Category: Long

Paddy had a reputation for playing around with other people’s wives.

Posted on August 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

Paddy, who had a reputation for playing around with other people’s wives, goes to his friend Mick and says, “I’m sleeping with Jack’s wife. Can you keep him busy in church for…

A bear and a rabbit are conscripted into the army, and waiting for their medical checkup.

Posted on August 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

The rabbit says to the bear, “listen, I really don't want to go to war. Can you just kick me in the leg, so that when I go in to see the…

Small town gets a new cow

Posted on August 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

The only cow in a small town in USA stopped giving milk. The people did some research and found that they could buy a cow from BC Canada for 1,000 dollars, or…

A politician dies and ends up at pearly gates.

Posted on August 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

Saint Peter says, we have a new policy for people in your profession. You get to spend one day in heaven and one day in hell, after which you get to decide…

The Undertaker

Posted on August 13, 2025 by Joke Poo

"The first thing you should know about working in a mortuary," the teacher said as he removed his latex glove and inserted a finger right up the arse of the body on…

A man walks into a bar and orders a whiskey

Posted on August 13, 2025 by Joke Poo

A man walks into a bar and orders a whiskey. The bartender hands him the drink, and says “That’ll be five dollars". The man replies, "Who said anything about money?" A lawyer…

a pirate walks into a bar

Posted on August 12, 2025 by Joke Poo

the bartender notices he has a peg for a leg, a hook for a hand, and a patch over one eye the bartender pours him a beer and asks, “what’s the story…

A bear is chasing a rabbit through the woods. Suddenly, they see a fairy tied to a tree..

Posted on August 12, 2025 by Joke Poo

They both stop, look a the fairy and decide to help her out. They go over to untie her. Thankful for being rescued, the fairy offers them each three wishes. Bear immediately…

Horny dogs…

Posted on August 11, 2025 by Joke Poo

Her dog came in heat and she was concerned about keeping it and her other male dog separated. But she had a large house and believed that she could keep the two…

Ministers going on vacation

Posted on August 11, 2025 by Joke Poo

There were three ministers in a small town. One was Baptist, one Methodist, and the other was Presbyterian. Since it was a small town, all three were good friends and they decided…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • I saw a dwarf climbing down a rope from a prison rooftop.
  • A Jewish woman came to her rabi, visibly upset.
  • Teacher asks Billy a math question
  • I find people can be so judgemental these days….
  • The butcher shop
  • September is Alzheimer’s awareness month
  • I saw a bison in the gym doing a workout the other day….
  • A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt.
  • Mexican Mayonnaise
  • I hate charging my electric car.
  • One day I called home and my kid answered. I asked where’s mom?
  • An old man comes to confession and says to the priest:
  • A Knock Knock Joke
  • What’s common between a testicular joke and testicular cancer?
  • A guy walks in a store looking to buy some beer
  • One afternoon, a teenage couple was on a hike in the woods.
  • Wish me luck, everyone! I have to meet with some people working at my bank in a few minutes. If all goes well I’ll pay off every debt I have, and still have enough to retire early.
  • A penguin was driving through a small town when his car broke down…
  • Not all construction tasks are equally enjoyable.
  • In a carpenter’s workshop, one apprentice makes a bet that he can recognize any type of wood just by its smell. They blindfold him and hand him the first board… the apprentice smells it confidently and says: “Oak!”
  • I was admitted into the hospital and as I settled into my bed, I overheard my “roommate” using the speakerphone to order breakfast from the cafeteria
  • My mom went on vacation to Florida
  • School year is like pregnancy.
  • A man visits his lawyer
  • A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer.
  • Election results are like group project grades
  • A librarian is having a discussion with a cobra…
  • Job interview question: Why ask for a high salary with no experience?
  • The other day I needed to pay a visit to a public toilet
  • A man doesn’t come home from work Friday, instead he spends the whole weekend out fishing with his buddies.
  • A hunter walks into a pub and says that he is the greatest hunter, he can recognize any game animal by its fur, and if they show him the wound, he can even tell which weapon killed it in exchange for a drink.
  • Guy : Doctor, my Girlfriend is pregnant but we always use protection and the rubber never broke. How is it possible?
  • (An original joke best read aloud) My friend got a job as one of those sushi girls. Y’know, where guys eat sushi off her naked.
  • What did the ghost of the Redditor say when looking at it’s own corpse?
  • What’s yellow and really hurts if it gets in your eye?
  • What a nice couple, how long have you been married?
  • Three cougars
  • Why did the BYU student come inside?
  • Reminder: terrorist jokes are tasteless and unfunny
  • Would make a joke about fencing
  • Possums are from the south
  • Did you know they just ruled dad jokes to be unconstitutional?
  • Boudreaux goes to the doctor
  • I called off work today when I saw the date
  • I hate people who take drugs
  • A very pregnant lady boarded a bus and noticed a young man smiling at her.
  • A gynecologist noticed his new patient was a little nervous.
  • The only two white actors in Black Panther are Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins, and Andy Serkis who played Gollum.
  • San Francisco, 1895. A man on the outskirts of town hires a cab driver to ride to the train station. No one wants to go that far, but one driver agrees.
  • A wife leaned into her husband and purred, “Have you ever seen twenty dollars all crumpled up?”

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