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Category: Long

Blind man and blondes

Posted on May 28, 2025 by Joke Poo

(My son told me this joke. It’s a bit long) A blind man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a beer. He and the bartender have a nice, but…

One day, Tarzan was swinging on vines in the jungle

Posted on May 27, 2025 by Joke Poo

One day, Tarzan was swinging on vines in the jungle when he saw a beautiful lady sunbathing on the ground. He walks up to her and because she is wearing a skimpy…

A blonde walks into a pharmacy and asks for bottom deodorant.

Posted on May 27, 2025 by Joke Poo

The assistant, a little bemused, explains to the woman they have never sold bottom deodorant. The blonde, unfazed, assures the lady behind the counter, that she has been buying the stuff from…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • What did the pickle say to the cucumber?
  • A young class were enjoying the first day of first grade.
  • At the hospital…
  • A woman is sitting at home, on the patio with her husband, drinking a glass of wine and she says, “I love you.”
  • The perch problem
  • In Russia, two guys are queuing to buy potatoes
  • There’s an old joke about the difference between American and Russian corruption.
  • Doctor’s advice for premature ejaculation didn’t go as planned
  • A man wakes up hungover in an alley with his pants off, and notices two colored rings painted on this dick, one brown, one red
  • Scientists took out the left half of a man’s brain
  • A widower goes to a psychic to contact his late wife. “Honey,” he says. “Are you happy?”
  • New Zealand would be so safe in case of a world war
  • A guy walks into a pharmacy and asks, “Do you have any antiseptics here?”
  • I spent a whole year making a belt out of clocks for a fat guy.
  • Why did the chicken cross the road?
  • Knock knock
  • Charley Pride was a legendary musician
  • Women are confusing. On my wife’s birthday, I wish her a Happy Birthday and she smiles happily at me
  • I’m AM going to put glue on my hands and then handle firearms. Nobody can tell me otherwise.
  • Why did Shakespeare only use quills
  • What did one tectonic plate say to the other when they bumped into each other?
  • Do the laundry
  • A couple invited their family over for Thanksgiving night to spend the holiday and meal together.
  • Three men are in an airplane. One is the pilot, the other two are a hippie and the someone self described as the world’s smartest man
  • Hi. What’s your name?
  • Guy goes to doctor about a sex addiction problem.
  • So a farmer asks a friend to come over to his place to help him fix his generator.
  • 1 in 4 people admit that they have texted while driving
  • Don’t feel like getting up in the morning to go to work?
  • I like to hibernate during the winter
  • 50 Cent started rapping in 1996
  • Timmy asks his Father how politics work
  • Teacher gift
  • What comes after a sextillion.
  • My son walked in with a rock in his hand
  • My child told me that I was an out of touch old fool.
  • An 89 year old woman buys herself some bright red crotchless panties.
  • The doctor says I have ADHD
  • A group of third, fourth and fifth graders
  • The secret to a conflictless marriage
  • There is something I don’t understand about 69
  • A Tibetan man, an Indian man, a German man and a Maltese man die and go to purgatory
  • A woman walks into a hospital wheeling her husband with her in a wheelbarrow
  • When do horses eat the most?
  • Confucius say…
  • An infinite line of mathematicians walk into a bar…
  • What was the quiet pooper’s motto?
  • Bartender looking at the client’s empty glass in front of him: “Would you like another one?”
  • What US military branch is the most patriotic?
  • Why is a car ferry like a condom?

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