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Category: Long

Joe in Las Vegas

Posted on August 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

Joe is working in his shop when suddenly he hears this booming, godlike voice in his head: “Joe, sell your business.” He shrugs it off, thinks he’s imagining things. But over the…

After the band Toto split, the frontman chased his love of maintaining trains.

Posted on August 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

He gets sent to Cape Town, where the trains keep getting stuck in the yards. Thinking quick, he sticks two locomotives at the back to push them. Surprisingly, this works! In America,…

There is a special place

Posted on August 16, 2025 by Joke Poo

A stingy old man was determined to prove wrong the old saying, “You can’t take it with you when you die.” After much thought, he finally figured out how to take at…

The fragile memory

Posted on August 16, 2025 by Joke Poo

An elderly couple noticed that they were getting a lot more forgetful, so they decided to go to the doctor. The doctor told them that they should start writing things down so…

The teacher asks the children in her third-grade class to give her a sentence using the word “fascinate.”

Posted on August 16, 2025 by Joke Poo

Mary raises her hand, stands up, and says, "My Mom and I went to the museum, and it was fascinating." "That's very nice, Mary," says the teacher. But you used 'fascinating.' Can…

Soviet military joke

Posted on August 16, 2025 by Joke Poo

Early XXth century. Russian civil war. A "reds" military commander has to write a regular report about his regiment daily activities, so he asks his aide: What should I do Pet'ka. If…

Betty’s busy in the kitchen preparing dinner when there’s a knock at the door.

Posted on August 16, 2025 by Joke Poo

Betty opens the door and there’s a stranger standing there in silence. “I’m really busy right now, and whatever you're selling, I'm not interested.” “Do you have a vagina?” WTF? Betty SLAMS…

Foo Bird

Posted on August 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

While visiting Australia, I heard people talking about the legendary Foo bird. I asked a local about it and he took me out in the bush near a great river, where a…

A CIA agent, an MI6 agent, and a KGB agent are walking through a forest..

Posted on August 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

They end up arguing about which service has the most skilled intelligence officers. As they argue, a little rabbit runs across the path in front of them. This gives them an idea…

An Englishman, a Frenchman and an Indian man

Posted on August 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

meet innocently enough in the waiting room of the local maternity ward in the 1950s. While they are making small talk, a panicked nurse comes running and tells them that there has…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • I find people can be so judgemental these days….
  • The butcher shop
  • September is Alzheimer’s awareness month
  • I saw a bison in the gym doing a workout the other day….
  • A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt.
  • Mexican Mayonnaise
  • I hate charging my electric car.
  • One day I called home and my kid answered. I asked where’s mom?
  • An old man comes to confession and says to the priest:
  • A Knock Knock Joke
  • What’s common between a testicular joke and testicular cancer?
  • A guy walks in a store looking to buy some beer
  • One afternoon, a teenage couple was on a hike in the woods.
  • Wish me luck, everyone! I have to meet with some people working at my bank in a few minutes. If all goes well I’ll pay off every debt I have, and still have enough to retire early.
  • A penguin was driving through a small town when his car broke down…
  • Not all construction tasks are equally enjoyable.
  • In a carpenter’s workshop, one apprentice makes a bet that he can recognize any type of wood just by its smell. They blindfold him and hand him the first board… the apprentice smells it confidently and says: “Oak!”
  • I was admitted into the hospital and as I settled into my bed, I overheard my “roommate” using the speakerphone to order breakfast from the cafeteria
  • My mom went on vacation to Florida
  • School year is like pregnancy.
  • A man visits his lawyer
  • A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer.
  • Election results are like group project grades
  • A librarian is having a discussion with a cobra…
  • Job interview question: Why ask for a high salary with no experience?
  • The other day I needed to pay a visit to a public toilet
  • A man doesn’t come home from work Friday, instead he spends the whole weekend out fishing with his buddies.
  • A hunter walks into a pub and says that he is the greatest hunter, he can recognize any game animal by its fur, and if they show him the wound, he can even tell which weapon killed it in exchange for a drink.
  • Guy : Doctor, my Girlfriend is pregnant but we always use protection and the rubber never broke. How is it possible?
  • (An original joke best read aloud) My friend got a job as one of those sushi girls. Y’know, where guys eat sushi off her naked.
  • What did the ghost of the Redditor say when looking at it’s own corpse?
  • What’s yellow and really hurts if it gets in your eye?
  • What a nice couple, how long have you been married?
  • Three cougars
  • Why did the BYU student come inside?
  • Reminder: terrorist jokes are tasteless and unfunny
  • Would make a joke about fencing
  • Possums are from the south
  • Did you know they just ruled dad jokes to be unconstitutional?
  • Boudreaux goes to the doctor
  • I called off work today when I saw the date
  • I hate people who take drugs
  • A very pregnant lady boarded a bus and noticed a young man smiling at her.
  • A gynecologist noticed his new patient was a little nervous.
  • The only two white actors in Black Panther are Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins, and Andy Serkis who played Gollum.
  • San Francisco, 1895. A man on the outskirts of town hires a cab driver to ride to the train station. No one wants to go that far, but one driver agrees.
  • A wife leaned into her husband and purred, “Have you ever seen twenty dollars all crumpled up?”
  • I promised my son…
  • Jogger sees fire
  • A salesman, Computer engineer and a system programmer

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