So he goes to the entrance, pays his two dollars, and goes inside. After about ten minutes, the act was to begin. Magnificent Bob came on stage wearing nothing but a bathrobe. Before him was a short table with five walnuts on it. Bob removed the robe revealing the largest penis ever. He grabbed it and, going down the line, smacked each walnut crushing them into tiny bits. The crowd went wild.
About twenty-five years later, Marvin again was walking through the same state fair and saw the same sign. "Come see The Magnificent Bob". So of course he had to see if it were the same performer. It was. The act was the same except there are five coconuts on the table. Bob comes out, takes off the robe, big Johnson, smashed coconuts, and crowd goes wild. After the performance, Marvin sees Bob on the Midway and talks with him. "Bob", Marvin starts, "I was here twenty-five years ago and saw your act but you were using walnuts. This time you used coconuts. Why did you switch?" Bob replied, "Well, after twenty-five years, my eyesight just ain't what it used to be".
Joke Poo: The Maestro’s Malady
Bartholomew "Barty" Buttersworth, a renowned concert pianist known for his flamboyant performances, was embarking on his farewell tour. He arrived at the Grand Majestic Theater, a legendary venue echoing with the ghosts of musical titans. A large banner outside proclaimed, "See Barty Buttersworth, The Key Crushing Maestro!".
He entered, and soon the anticipation was palpable. Barty, a portly man in a velvet tuxedo, waddled onto the stage. Before him stood a pristine Steinway grand piano, and atop it, five delicate porcelain teacups. Barty took a deep breath, raised his hands high above the keyboard, and then proceeded to slam down on the keys with such force and precision that each teacup shattered into a million pieces, the sound reverberating through the hall. The audience erupted in thunderous applause.
Twenty years later, a much older and even more rotund Barty was back at the Grand Majestic, a walker his new companion. The banner, slightly faded, still read "See Barty Buttersworth, The Key Crushing Maestro!". Curious, a patron who had witnessed the original performance attended again. This time, five solid bowling balls sat atop the piano. Barty, with a groan, launched himself onto the keys, each strike sending a bowling ball crashing to the floor, leaving dents and cracks in the wooden stage. The audience was stunned, then cheered wildly.
After the show, the patron caught up with Barty backstage. "Mr. Buttersworth," he began, "I saw you perform many years ago with the teacups. Why the switch to bowling balls?"
Barty sighed, adjusted his hearing aid, and rasped, "Well, after twenty years, my bowels just ain’t what they used to be."
Alright, let’s break down this joke and then fertilize it with some comedic growth hormones.
Joke Dissection:
- Premise: A man witnesses a bizarre sideshow act featuring a man with an exceptionally large penis smashing nuts (walnuts initially, then coconuts).
- Setup: Marvin revisits the same fair after 25 years and sees the same act, but with a key change (coconuts instead of walnuts).
- Punchline: The reason for the switch is Bob’s declining eyesight, implying the need for larger targets.
- Humor Source: The humor stems from the juxtaposition of the absurd (smashing nuts with a penis) with the mundane (age-related eyesight decline). The unexpected explanation twists the initial spectacle into a relatable, slightly embarrassing scenario.
Key Elements:
- The Spectacle: The act itself, the absurdity of it, and the "Magnificent Bob" persona.
- The Nuts: The changing type of nuts (walnuts vs. coconuts) is the central plot device.
- The Penis: Its size is crucial for the setup and the punchline to work. It’s the "tool" in both senses.
- Time: The 25-year gap is important for establishing the aging process.
- Eyesight: The declining eyesight is the unexpected, deflating explanation that generates the laugh.
Comedic Enrichment – Observation and New Joke:
Observation:
It’s interesting how the Magnificent Bob relies on locally sourced produce. He could really corner the market if he traveled to different state fairs. "Magnificent Bob and his Acorns of Alabama!" "Magnificent Bob and the Pecans of Georgia!" "Magnificent Bob and the Chestnuts (roasted on an open fire… by… well, you get the idea) of New York!" He’d probably need a bigger bathrobe, though, what with all the licensing agreements.
New Joke:
Magnificent Bob was having a really rough night. His act wasn’t going well. Coconuts were flying everywhere, he kept hitting his knee, and the crowd was booing. Finally, in the middle of it all, the ringmaster came running up, waving a contract in his face.
"Bob, what’s going on?! You signed a deal with the State Fair Association to smash macadamia nuts for the next year. These are coconuts! Why are you smashing coconuts?"
Bob looked at the ringmaster, confused. He blinked a few times, adjusted his glasses, and said, "Macadamia? I thought you said My Academia!"
Why this works:
- Builds on the original: It retains the core elements of Magnificent Bob, the nuts, and the eyesight issues.
- Twist: It introduces a new layer of absurdity by playing on a phonetic misunderstanding. "My Academia" implies a sudden, unexpected interest in a particular field.
- Humor: The humor comes from the completely illogical interpretation of the request and the idea of Bob’s act involving the destruction of a university or intellectual pursuit with his… appendage.
Hopefully, that adds a bit of comedic oomph to Magnificent Bob’s legacy!