Skip to content
Joke Poo
Menu
  • Home
    • The Enduring Power of a Good Joke
  • Categories
    • Totally Feckin random
    • Why Did
    • Long
    • Wife
    • Walks into a bar
    • Dog
    • Bartender
    • Husband
    • Doctor
    • Chicken
Menu
Joke Poo

My sex life with my ex was like the Mcdonalds Ice Cream Machine…

Posted on May 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

No matter how excited you were to get a treat, no matter how much he advertised…It was always out of order and never worked.

Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo," titled appropriately:

Joke Poo: My Social Battery is Like a Public Toilet

My social battery is like a public toilet…

No matter how desperately you need it after a long journey, and no matter how brightly lit the sign might be… It’s usually disgusting, probably overflowing, and you just know you’re going to regret going in there.

Alright, let’s break down this joke.

Core Elements:

  • Premise: A comparison between a frustrating sex life and the notoriously unreliable McDonald’s ice cream machine.
  • Target: Failed intimacy, broken promises, and disappointment.
  • Humor Mechanism: Analogy (comparing two seemingly disparate things to reveal a shared characteristic – in this case, dysfunctionality). Relatability – many people have experienced the disappointment of a broken McDonald’s ice cream machine. Self-deprecating (likely aimed at the speaker’s past self or relationship).

Factual/Interesting Tidbits Related to the Elements:

  • McDonald’s Ice Cream Machine Woes: The machines are often out of service due to a complicated self-cleaning process that can take hours, and often employees don’t have the time or training to properly troubleshoot issues. There’s even a class-action lawsuit related to the machine’s reliability.
  • Relationship Dynamics: Advertising and excitement are common aspects of the initial stages of a relationship, but the true compatibility and functionality are proven over time.

New Piece of Humor – Witty Observation:

"You know, McDonald’s should take a page from the book of exes. They’re experts at managing expectations. ‘We’re lovin’ it!’ quickly translates to ‘Sorry, this feature is temporarily unavailable due to unforeseen circumstances. Please try again…never.’"

Explanation of the New Humor:

This builds on the original joke by:

  • Expanding on the McDonald’s Brand: We use their iconic slogan and then subvert it.
  • Drawing a Parallel: It further highlights the similarity between a frustrating restaurant experience and a disappointing relationship, specifically the way promises are made and then broken.
  • Adding a Cynical Twist: The "never" at the end provides a punchline that emphasizes the feeling of perpetual disappointment that both the broken ice cream machine and the bad relationship inspire.

Bonus Joke:

Why did the relationship go bankrupt? Because it was running on a McDonald’s ice cream machine’s business model – constantly breaking down, costing more to maintain than it was worth, and ultimately offering very little satisfaction.

Todays SH1T Jokes

  • The CIA advertises for an assassin and three applicants, Tom, Dick and Harry, are chosen for a final test
  • What did the pickle say to the cucumber?
  • A young class were enjoying the first day of first grade.
  • At the hospital…
  • A woman is sitting at home, on the patio with her husband, drinking a glass of wine and she says, “I love you.”
  • The perch problem
  • In Russia, two guys are queuing to buy potatoes
  • There’s an old joke about the difference between American and Russian corruption.
  • Doctor’s advice for premature ejaculation didn’t go as planned
  • A man wakes up hungover in an alley with his pants off, and notices two colored rings painted on this dick, one brown, one red
  • Scientists took out the left half of a man’s brain
  • A widower goes to a psychic to contact his late wife. “Honey,” he says. “Are you happy?”
  • New Zealand would be so safe in case of a world war
  • A guy walks into a pharmacy and asks, “Do you have any antiseptics here?”
  • I spent a whole year making a belt out of clocks for a fat guy.
  • Why did the chicken cross the road?
  • Knock knock
  • Charley Pride was a legendary musician
  • Women are confusing. On my wife’s birthday, I wish her a Happy Birthday and she smiles happily at me
  • I’m AM going to put glue on my hands and then handle firearms. Nobody can tell me otherwise.
  • Why did Shakespeare only use quills
  • What did one tectonic plate say to the other when they bumped into each other?
  • Do the laundry
  • A couple invited their family over for Thanksgiving night to spend the holiday and meal together.
  • Three men are in an airplane. One is the pilot, the other two are a hippie and the someone self described as the world’s smartest man
  • Hi. What’s your name?
  • Guy goes to doctor about a sex addiction problem.
  • So a farmer asks a friend to come over to his place to help him fix his generator.
  • 1 in 4 people admit that they have texted while driving
  • Don’t feel like getting up in the morning to go to work?
  • I like to hibernate during the winter
  • 50 Cent started rapping in 1996
  • Timmy asks his Father how politics work
  • Teacher gift
  • What comes after a sextillion.
  • My son walked in with a rock in his hand
  • My child told me that I was an out of touch old fool.
  • An 89 year old woman buys herself some bright red crotchless panties.
  • The doctor says I have ADHD
  • A group of third, fourth and fifth graders
  • The secret to a conflictless marriage
  • There is something I don’t understand about 69
  • A Tibetan man, an Indian man, a German man and a Maltese man die and go to purgatory
  • A woman walks into a hospital wheeling her husband with her in a wheelbarrow
  • When do horses eat the most?
  • Confucius say…
  • An infinite line of mathematicians walk into a bar…
  • What was the quiet pooper’s motto?
  • Bartender looking at the client’s empty glass in front of him: “Would you like another one?”
  • What US military branch is the most patriotic?

Categories

  • "Walks into a bar"
  • Bartender
  • Blonde
  • Chicken
  • Doctor
  • Dog
  • Heaven
  • Husband
  • Irishman
  • Knock Knock
  • Knock-Knock Joke
  • Lawyer
  • Long
  • Mother-in-law
  • Politician
  • Priest
  • Totally Feckin random
  • Walks into a bar
  • What's the difference
  • Why Did
  • Wife
©2025 Joke Poo | Design: Newspaperly WordPress Theme