Skip to content
Joke Poo
Menu
  • Home
    • The Enduring Power of a Good Joke
  • Categories
    • Totally Feckin random
    • Why Did
    • Long
    • Wife
    • Walks into a bar
    • Dog
    • Bartender
    • Husband
    • Doctor
    • Chicken
  • Privacy Policy
Menu
Joke Poo

[NSFW] Sex On The Sabbath

Posted on July 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

A man wonders if having sex on the Sabbath is a sin because he is not sure if sex is work or pleasure. So he goes to a priest and asks for his opinion on this question.

After consulting the Bible, the priest says, "My son, after an exhaustive search, I am positive that sex is work and is therefore not permitted on Sundays."

The man thinks, "What does a priest know about sex"?

So he goes to a Lutheran minister, who after all is a married man and experienced in this matter.

He queries the minister and receives the same reply, "Sex is work and therefore not for the Sabbath"!

Not pleased with the reply, he seeks out a Rabbi, a man of thousands of years tradition and knowledge.

The Rabbi ponders the question, then states, "My son, sex is definitely pleasure."

The man replies, "Rabbi, how can you be so sure when so many others tell me sex is work"?

The Rabbi softly speaks, "My son, if sex was work, my wife would have the maid do it."

Okay, here’s my attempt, playing on the same theme of seeking religious guidance on a personal matter, but shifting the subject and perspective, and leaning into a more absurd, slightly gross humor:

Joke Poo

A young couple, fretting over the ecological impact of their composting toilet, wondered if using single-ply versus three-ply toilet paper on the farm was an environmental sin. They were unsure if the extra ply constituted excessive waste or simply more efficient cleaning.

So, they first went to a Birkenstocked environmentalist and asked for his opinion on this crucial matter.

After consulting several permaculture manuals and composting guides, the environmentalist said, “My friends, after an exhaustive search, I am positive that three-ply is pure, unadulterated excess and therefore verboten!”

The couple, still concerned about hygiene, next went to a meticulously clean doctor, hoping for a more medically informed opinion.

He examined their bathroom setup and hygiene habits. With a solemn face, the doctor gave the same reply: “Three-ply is a wasteful indulgence that cannot be excused.”

Not pleased with these answers, and quite frankly, a little nervous about their comfort level, they sought out an ancient, wise Guru, a man known for his holistic approach to life and enlightenment.

The Guru meditated on the question for a very long time, then stated, “My children, three-ply is most definitely a pleasure.”

The couple replied, “Guru, how can you be so sure when so many others tell us three-ply is a wasteful sin?”

The Guru softly spoke, “My children, if three-ply were truly wasteful, I would have my students do it.”

Okay, let’s break down this joke and then build some comedic bridges from it.

Joke Dissection:

  • Premise: A man seeks religious guidance on whether sex on the Sabbath is permissible, specifically questioning if it constitutes “work” or “pleasure.”
  • Structure: The joke employs a classic setup-punchline structure. The man consults religious figures of different denominations (Catholic Priest, Lutheran Minister, Rabbi), building expectation and contrasting perspectives.
  • Humor Type: This is primarily an observational joke with elements of stereotype and incongruity. The humor arises from:
    • The contrast between the religious figures’ perceived understanding of sex.
    • The unexpected, pragmatic (and somewhat cynical) answer of the Rabbi.
    • The underlying suggestion that sex is, for some people, a chore.
  • Key Elements:
    • Religion/Sabbath: The framework for the moral dilemma.
    • Sex: The subject of the dilemma and the source of potential guilt/pleasure.
    • Religious Figures (Priest, Minister, Rabbi): Representing different approaches to religious law and personal experience.
    • “Work” vs. “Pleasure”: The central conflict defining the act of sex.
    • Wife/Maid: Introduces a social and marital dynamic to the punchline.

Comedic Enrichment:

Here are a few ways we can build off this joke:

1. Witty Observation/Alternative Punchline:

“The man, still conflicted, finally asked his wife. She sighed, ‘Honey, if it were work, I’d have outsourced it years ago.'” (This plays on the outsourcing trend, extending the Rabbi’s sentiment to a contemporary context.)

2. Amusing “Did You Know?” related to sex and religion:

“Did you know that in certain interpretations of the Talmud, marital relations are not only permitted but encouraged on the Sabbath? It’s considered an ‘oneg Shabbat’ – a Sabbath delight. Apparently, some Rabbis considered it a religious duty, because what better way to honor God’s creation than to, well, create?”

3. New Joke (playing on “work” aspect):

A couple argues after a particularly unsatisfying encounter.

“You call that sex?” the wife complains. “It felt like you were just clocking in for overtime!”

The husband retorts, “Well, someone’s gotta bring home the bacon, and apparently, you’re on strike.”

4. Philosophical Observation:

Perhaps the real question isn’t whether sex is work or pleasure, but whether we can find pleasure in the work. Because let’s be honest, sometimes it’s both.

5. Continuing the theme with a new character:

The man, still searching, asks a Tantric guru. The guru closes his eyes, breathes deeply, and says, “My son, whether it’s work or pleasure is irrelevant. It’s about the energetic exchange. Now, let’s discuss your chakra alignment…”

Todays SH1T Jokes

  • Three weeks after the wedding the wife is calling her mom sobbing over the phone.
  • Two men were washed ashore during WWI.
  • [NSFW] Sex On The Sabbath
  • If Count Von Count is a vampire who likes numbers, what do you call a vampire who likes words?
  • A woman on a bus is suddenly overcome with the urge to break wind. She tries to let go a squeaker but instead lets loose a loud, disgusting blast.
  • A Chinese man and woman gets married
  • A man walked into a bar
  • How do you fit a kayak into a glove compartment?
  • A woman in a supermarket hurries to the express line with a few items.
  • When I got married, I was always so incompetent about everything around the house.
  • What’s a kidnapper’s favorite shoes?
  • I asked the IT guy, “How do you make a motherboard?”
  • Two Irishmen leave a funeral
  • Paying Guest
  • Two men drinking in a bar
  • I’m debating whether I should move to Switzerland. On the one hand, I don’t like the cold…
  • A lot of people are upset about Superman being an illegal alien, wait until they realise he’s…
  • Where’s mommy?
  • A little 10-year-old girl was walking home alone from school one day!
  • [NSFW] My granddad
  • My wife came home with four cases of beer, three boxes of wine, two bottles of whiskey and two loaves of bread.
  • Young woman gets tired of guys her age who couldn’t afford any nice restaurants.
  • I went to the doctor for my prostate exam.
  • Linda was well over thirty, but still completely flat-chested.
  • A man named pun walks into a room and ten people are found dead afterwards after he left
  • What is the fear of seeing all species of donkeys at once called?
  • How do New Zealanders find sheep in tall grass.
  • A 104-year-old man is being interviewed on the news.
  • How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish man?
  • Drinking buddies
  • A demon runs a factory in Hell, and has a bunch of underlings working for it.
  • A priest …
  • How did Alan Greenspan answer his wife when she asked him “do these jeans make me look fat?”
  • What the rudest elf that works for Santa?
  • Did you hear about the guy who was sexually aroused by envelopes?
  • I like my women, just like how I like my laptop
  • Why does spider-man have such snappy comebacks?
  • My over weight friend had a heart attack while he orgasmed….
  • Starting a new website for d*ck pics
  • I can’t believe how well I’m accepting my husband’s small manhood.
  • At a meeting, the corporate manager told a joke.
  • George staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Henry.
  • A Boeing 777 was lumbering along at just under 500 mph.
  • A woman doesn’t come home one night. The next day she tells her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend’s house. The husband calls his wife’s 10 best friends. None of them know anything about it.
  • God is speaking to Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden
  • One day while he was building a barn
  • What do you call a cat, that gets away with a crime?
  • So Schrödinger’s cat walks into a bar
  • God forgot something !
  • I’m writing a musical about an exchange student who becomes a nanny in Canada and garners a following when she blogs about it. It’s called…

Categories

  • "Walks into a bar"
  • Bartender
  • Blonde
  • Chicken
  • Dirty
  • Doctor
  • Dog
  • Heaven
  • Husband
  • Irishman
  • Knock Knock
  • Knock-Knock Joke
  • Lawyer
  • Lightbulb
  • Long
  • Mother-in-law
  • Politician
  • Priest
  • Religion
  • Totally Feckin random
  • Walks into a bar
  • What's the difference
  • Why Did
  • Wife
©2025 Joke Poo | Design: Newspaperly WordPress Theme