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A kilted Scotsman was walking home from a pub one morning after a night of whisky. He collapses by the roadside for a nap.

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

While he slept, two woman came by and saw him lying there. One of them was overcome with curiosity and decided to see what was worn under a kilt. She lifted his…

Recently a guy in our friends group came out as being a car-philiac.

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

Now, we can laugh all we want, but he's still the only guy in our group who has sex with a model. Original Joke: Recently a guy in our friends group came…

A guy is rushed to the hospital and plugged into life support.

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

He says to the nurse, "If I go into a coma, do me a favour and just pull it. Don't wait, just pull it." The nurse is about to object, but he…

A businessman goes on a business trip to Japan

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

When he arrives in Tokyo, he meets up with his bilingual business partner who speaks fluent Japanese. “I’ve got the perfect plan,” says his business partner. “I’ve sent a hooker to your…

A Texan is in Boston

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

Where he meets a woman in the hotel bar. "Where'd y'all go to college?" he asks. She replies, "Yale" Cupping his hands around his mouth, he shouts, "I SAID, WHERE'D Y'ALL GO…

A son in love confides in his father

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

A son confides in his father: I met a beautiful girl. But she says she will only take me to dinner if I have a Ferrari, a million in my account and…

Scientists have determined that human breast milk is the perfect food.

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

Well, based on the packaging anyway… Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version based on your provided joke: Title: Dog-Gone Data Veterinarians have concluded that premium dog food is the most scientifically advanced…

My Girlfriend yelled at me, “Stop it with all your corny jokes”

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

I said, "What are you gonna do, call the crops?" Joke Poo: Title: My Accountant Yelled My Accountant yelled at me, “Stop it with all these frivolous deductions!” I said, “What are…

Three men check into a hotel and ask for rooms with balconies.

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

They get the only rooms with balconies on the first, second, and third floors. In the morning, the man who stayed on the third floor sees his friend in the lobby and…

An African prince comes to the USA and meets a beautiful woman.

Posted on October 28, 2025 by Joke Poo

He proposes to her on the spot. She says "I'll only marry you if you can buy me a Lamborghini." Without hesitation, he says "ok, I buy, I buy." She then says…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • A shy Italian girl gets married
  • a stoner, a jedi and emergency room surgeon walk into a bar
  • I bought a Hustler magazine and boy was I disappointed
  • What’s a debt collector’s favourite herb?
  • What’s the most negative month of the year?
  • A Man Is Invited To A Christmas Fancy Dress Party
  • You can’t trust people on Halloween anymore!
  • What did the Catholic priest say to his disciple?
  • The other day an old guy called about an Australian stick.
  • The Queen, the Pope and Nelson Mandela walk into a bar
  • Good Christians should never use euphemisms for the toilet
  • I went for a swim in France on a blowy day.
  • My masochist girlfriend said, “Choke me!”
  • Ever wondered which service has the toughest troops?
  • A doctor comes into the room, shaking his head at the clipboard in his hands, and tells the patient they’re being moved to the east wing.
  • What do you call a ghosts poop?
  • I just brought a 2nd hand book about pasta.
  • Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
  • What dance did the cheese do at the Halloween party?
  • What happens when you’re late for a bris?
  • I’m getting tired of these trick or treaters this evening….
  • Patient: “Doctor! My stool is never solid!”
  • A truck carrying several rhesus moneys overturned.
  • The teacher said, “Steven why don’t you tell the rest of the class something you’re not very good at that begins with the letter N,”
  • Plumber at work
  • What do hillbillies do for Halloween?
  • Driving through the hills of Arkansas I noticed a large herd of cows grazing on a steep hillside pasture and thought
  • I was gonna tell a joke, but um…
  • Graveyard calling
  • What’s the easiest way to get in touch with your inner self??
  • For Halloween this year, I’m wearing pasties and a G-string
  • The singer in Roxette wouldn’t tell me her tennis score…
  • A detective rings the doorbell of an English mansion.
  • I asked my doctor about my prostate health and they gave me thumbs up
  • A  man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by.
  • Manager to his employee: “This is the 5th day in a row that you’re late to work. What conclusions should I make based on that?”
  • I was told that
  • Why don’t witches like winter?
  • I’m proud to say that I’m an award winning procrastinator.
  • What is the formal scientific term for what the adult film industry calls a “facial?”
  • A rope walked into a bar. . .
  • A popcorn vendor asks the customer whether he would like his popcorn sweet or salty… The customer gazes lovingly at his girlfriend and replies “I want it like her”
  • A fireman was working on the engine outside the station when he noticed a little girl nearby in a red wagon.
  • What do lice say when they feel they’ve overstayed their welcome?
  • Missing his son
  • How I want to die
  • Dirty lil’ Johnny.. (I hope its a new one)
  • The experimental surgery
  • Three men are captured by cannibals.
  • A castaway sees a ship, but watches it sinks, leaving one survivor in the water.

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