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My friends said that I couldn’t do poetry because of my dyslexia.

Posted on June 30, 2025 by Joke Poo

But I've already made a vase, a bowl and a mug, so I sure showed them. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on the original, titled "Joke Poo": Joke…

I was fired from my construction job after I caused a 10 car pileup

Posted on June 30, 2025 by Joke Poo

It was my dumb asphalt. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" inspired by your asphalt joke, titled Joke Poo: The Fertilizer Fiasco: I was banned from the community garden after…

Aliens are invading Earth and humanity’s fate resides in telling them ONE original joke

Posted on June 30, 2025 by Joke Poo

Alien Commander: “Humans! After centuries of observation, we’ve concluded that humor is the highest form of intelligence. Judging by your endless reposts on r/Jokes… your species has failed. Total eradication begins unless…

I was awaken with oral sex this morning!

Posted on June 30, 2025 by Joke Poo

I learned not to fall asleep with the mouth open on the train. Joke Poo: Joke Fertilizer I woke up covered in fertilizer this morning! …I learned not to fall asleep face-first…

Wife: This vacuum is broken, it quit sucking

Posted on June 30, 2025 by Joke Poo

Husband: It must've gotten married. Joke Poo: Original Joke: Wife: This vacuum is broken, it quit sucking. Husband: It must’ve gotten married. New Joke (Joke Poo): Therapist: My ventriloquist dummy has stopped…

A DEA officer stopped at our farm yesterday. “I need to inspect your farm for illegal growing drugs.”

Posted on June 30, 2025 by Joke Poo

I said, “Okay, but don’t go in that field over there.” The DEA officer verbally exploded, saying, “Mister, I have the authority of the federal government with me!” Reaching into his back…

Canadians in Australia

Posted on June 30, 2025 by Joke Poo

A couple of gals from Canada decide to travel to Australia over the winter to get a break from 40 below, ice and snow. They're sitting at a club in Perth, enjoying…

A man walks into a bar for a drink.

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

The bartender hands him a shot and says, "That's the Spirit!". Okay, here’s my attempt at "Joke Poo" based on your prompt: Joke Poo: The Compost Heap A gardener is meticulously tending…

I have a special testicle

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

It’s a specticle Okay, I’ll take that joke and try to rework it while keeping the punchy, slightly absurd structure. Original Joke: I have a special testicle. It’s a specticle. Joke Poo:…

I found out today that tree surgeons refuse to trim hedges

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

Apparently it's beneath them Okay, here’s my attempt at "Joke Poo," riffing on your tree surgeon joke: Joke Poo: Plumbing Pride I learned that master plumbers won’t unclog shower drains… Apparently, they…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • Yo mama so clumsy
  • Man sits down at the bar and orders…
  • Two caterpillars are trying to escape from a pursuing spider…
  • What has five toes, but isn’t your foot?
  • Why did the Rebels in Star Wars go metric?
  • It was five o’clock, and the shift at the coal mine was over
  • A man doesn’t know the meaning of true happiness until he gets married.
  • “I’ve been talking to supernatural entities for years, and they are trying to seduce me,” I told my doctor.
  • When we were first married my wife had the body of a supermodel
  • A redneck goes to the doctor for a physical. “I need stool sample, a urine sample, and a sperm sample,” says the doctor.
  • Omar Epps moved nextdoor to Chris Hemsworth.
  • A drunk man is refused service at a bar, so he tries to sneak in through different doors
  • Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. I’ve been with a loose girl.
  • Bubba and Billy Bob were known for having below average IQ around Little Rock.
  • Son: “Mom, all the kids in the school are making fun of me because I am still a virgin.”
  • My husband and i have a secret to making our marriage last.
  • A Proctologist Goes To The Grocery
  • A boy tells his father: “Dad, I have such a strong desire to live forever. What should I do?”
  • Confucius say baseball wrong.
  • The wrestler
  • God some people have no shame. Just got on a bus with 20 people in fetish costumes.
  • Why did the chicken go to the seance?
  • I went into my local bakery to buy a cake…
  • A wealthy real estate investor is looking to buy more land for development, but a local farmer won’t sell the last plot he needs
  • I found my absolute favorite machine at the gym today.
  • What do you call it when a boy finally claps back with a really good dad joke to his own dad?
  • Ma and Pa were two old folks living out on a farm up in the hills.
  • Why did the fat emu feel left out?
  • Adam a new recruit
  • A guy walks into a bar and orders a martini.
  • Had to throw out my carbon monoxide detector today.
  • Today I went to the optician. They said I am colorblind.
  • After sex last night my girlfriend said “your easily the biggest I’ve ever had.”.
  • My wife started doing black magic on dolls. I said, “This is nonsense.”
  • Our teacher asked us what our favorite animal was.
  • A young family moved into the house next door to a vacant lot.
  • What do you do when you’re attacked by a gang of circus performers?
  • What has 9 hands and sucks?
  • I told my girlfriend she should embrace her mistakes…..
  • An animal control official knocks on a man’s door
  • I had a weird living tree-guy do the tile for my bathroom.
  • A friar is like a monk, except that he’s not confined to a monastery.
  • My school got raided
  • What do you call it when cows masturbate?
  • A man is trying to remember the name of a restaurant from his childhood, so he visits his elderly father.
  • An Irish man walks into a bar
  • What did the porn star have for lunch?
  • One year, for my birthday, my dad took me to one of those restaurants where kids under 10 eat for free. Right before we walked in, he goes, ‘Remember. You’re 9 today.’ I panicked. Ten seconds later, the hostess asks, ‘And how old are you, birthday boy?’ I blurted out, ‘Twelve!’ My dad was so mad.
  • People are now talking about the missing minute from the security camera.
  • The husband leans over and asks his wife…

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