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I finally decided to take a stand against my bossy wife

Posted on October 23, 2025 by Joke Poo

I told her, “Look, babe, I’m the man of this house. I wear the pants around here, and starting tomorrow, things are gonna change!” She said, “Okay, I’m fine with that! What…

My wife just got back from a thrilling trip to Walmart.

Posted on October 23, 2025 by Joke Poo

My wife walked in from Walmart, slammed the grocery bags on the counter, and fumed, "That cashier was a complete and utter b*tch!" Trying to be helpful, I asked, "Just to be…

Snake Plissken joined a teleconference

Posted on October 23, 2025 by Joke Poo

It was a Skype from New York. Okay, here’s the original joke: “Snake Plissken joined a teleconference. It was a Skype from New York.” And here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo”…

I never got along with my dad…

Posted on October 23, 2025 by Joke Poo

…kids used to come up to me and say, 'My dad can beat up your dad.' – – – I'd say 'Yeah? – – – – – When?' —Bill Hicks Joke Poo:…

A young man was in a tragic car accident, and he lost the front half of both feet. A few days later his girlfriend dumped him.

Posted on October 23, 2025 by Joke Poo

She said they couldn’t be together anymore because she was lack-toes intolerant. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on the original, titled “Joke Poo”: Title: Joke Poo An astronaut…

You hear about that heist at the French museum?

Posted on October 23, 2025 by Joke Poo

You win some; you Lourve some Okay, here’s my attempt: Joke Poo: The Flush of Genius You hear about the plumber’s masterpiece exhibited at the art gallery? …They said it was a…

Why did the sith lord have sore knees?

Posted on October 23, 2025 by Joke Poo

Darthritis. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on the Darth Vader knee joke, aiming for a similar pun-based structure and a bit of absurdity: Joke Poo: Why did the…

Why do women have cleaner minds than men?

Posted on October 23, 2025 by Joke Poo

Because they change them so often. Okay, here’s a new joke titled “Joke Poo” based on your provided joke, attempting to capture a similar kind of surprising twist: Joke Poo: Why do…

My ex needs a kidney transplant

Posted on October 23, 2025 by Joke Poo

And I’m not worried, cause she has never rejected an organ Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” take on the kidney transplant joke: Joke Poo: The Compost Heap My prize-winning rose bush needs…

I got kicked out and banned from the local Laser Tag arena

Posted on October 23, 2025 by Joke Poo

Apparently, they frown on you using a knife to save ammo Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version, inspired by your Laser Tag joke: Joke Poo: The Library Late Fee I got suspended…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • A physicist is walking past a building…
  • A mistress is like a grenade.
  • Sorry Alliens
  • The Skinny Lumberjack
  • What’s the difference between a manly lesbian and a really short guy who works in the meat department?
  • I was thinking about having dinner at a family style restaurant by myself.
  • I made a helpful suggestion about my wife’s donation bag
  • A family goes on vacation to the beach in southern Mexico.
  • What’s a popular 60s pop duo with many Muslim?
  • A man adopts a stray dog.
  • An alcoholic read an article on the dangers of drinking alcohol and decided it was finally time to quit…
  • The wife is calling her husband at work.
  • Sue went to the cemetery every day to water the flowers on the grave of her late husband, Bob.
  • A guy’s wife comes into the room and says to her husband, “What the hell are you doing? I thought you were going to fix the sink!”
  • What do you call a photo of an old person?
  • Why are math books always so stressed?
  • Nobody came to my cocktail party
  • I just ran into a guy quoting V for Vendetta. You know, the whole “remember, remember the fifth of November,” speech. And I could help but think…
  • I just bought a 5 foot tall flightless bird for $3
  • Wife says that I’m cheap
  • I just got accused of mansplaining!
  • We were desperate to fix our son’s failing math grade.
  • A couple, both 78, went to see a therapist.
  • What did the vampires mother say when he told her he wanted to marry a werewolf?
  • Being an alcoholic is gambling with your life.
  • I failed the fire safety quiz at work earlier…
  • A truck carrying a penis for transplant swerved and fell into a hole
  • A dentist who lives down the street from me got busted for dealing drugs.
  • Cheney, about Mamdani:
  • At a poetry competition, there were two finalists!
  • The Riverside High
  • Two nuns, Bridget and Theresa, were on their bikes heading back to the convent in Dublin one night.
  • Strange but true: When you see ducks flying south in a ‘V’ formation, why is one line always longer than the other?
  • What do you get if you cross a dyslexic with an agnostic who has insomnia?
  • The professor of medicine is teaching the students about dissection
  • Am I the first person you have ever slept with?
  • Describe your love life in two words.
  • Cop understood the assignment.
  • Doctor, help me. I’m addicted to buying yachts. Is there something you can give me for it?
  • Teacher and her 3 boy students:
  • The woman I’m sleeping with keeps telling me I don’t need to be intimidated by the size of her ex’s dick
  • As we drove past some black and white cows my dad said “wow, it must be really cold out there…
  • Last year I bought my wife an artificial leg for Christmas…
  • I’m starting a research project into bestiality
  • I’m over 40 years old and I’ve never used essential oils…
  • I don’t know why everyone thinks of mobsters as bad guys.
  • Found out last night that I’m both gay and dyslexic.
  • I once dated a girl who was actually a ghost.
  • Satan arrived to welcome a new damned soul to hell. “Congratulations!” he said. “You wasted your entire pitiful life!”
  • A boy found a magic lamp one day and out came a genie who exclaimed “I shall grant a single wish that you desire!”

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