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Three cowboys, one campfire, and a whole lot of testosterone…

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

Three tough cowboys were sitting around the campfire one night, bragging about how fearless and rugged they are. The first one says: "Just yesterday, I was walking along Dead Man’s Trail when…

What would you do if you had one day to live?

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

Old Man 1. “I’d have sex with anything that moved. What would you do?” Old Man 2. “Stand very still” Joke Poo: The Compost Heap Old Tomato 1: “If I only had…

My father always likes to say, “It’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey”.

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

Wonderful man, terrible bus driver. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" version: Joke Poo: The Compost Heap My mother always loved telling me, "Everything returns to the earth." Wonderful woman,…

Two babies are born in the same hospital, at the exact same time

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

Two babies are born in the same hospital, at the exact same time. Room 203, side by side in their little incubators. Nurses say it was adorable—both boys, blinking up at the…

The other day my neighbor gave me permission to come into her yard.

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

Then she got all mad because I did it from my side of the fence. Joke Poo: The Remote Exam The professor gave us permission to use any resources we wanted on…

What do you have if you have one large green ball in your left hand and one large green ball in your right hand?

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

The undivided attention of the Hulk. Joke Poo: What do you have if you have a tiny, shimmering, almost invisible speck of fairy dust in your left hand and a tiny, shimmering,…

One my 11 year old daughter made up – What kind of shoes do dogs wear?

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

Barkenstocks Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo," riffing on your daughter’s clever pun: Joke Poo: What kind of underwear do cats wear? Catty Bloomers! Alright, let’s break down this "Barkenstocks"…

My favorite Soviet era joke:

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

Three Russian men were sent by their company to attend a convention in Moscow. All 3 shared a hotel room. Two of them cracked open a bottle of vodka, but the third…

The world champion baker retired from bread-making

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

They said they had nothing left to prove. Okay, here’s the original joke and my attempt at a "Joke Poo" version, titled accordingly: Original Joke: The world champion baker retired from bread-making….

I first met me wife in unisex bathroom. She was in one cubicle and I was in the next…..

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

It was love at first shite Okay, here’s my "Joke Poo" version of your joke, titled "The IT Upgrade": The IT Upgrade I first encountered our new AI assistant during a system-wide…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • For Halloween this year, I’m wearing pasties and a G-string
  • The singer in Roxette wouldn’t tell me her tennis score…
  • A detective rings the doorbell of an English mansion.
  • I asked my doctor about my prostate health and they gave me thumbs up
  • A  man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by.
  • Manager to his employee: “This is the 5th day in a row that you’re late to work. What conclusions should I make based on that?”
  • I was told that
  • Why don’t witches like winter?
  • I’m proud to say that I’m an award winning procrastinator.
  • What is the formal scientific term for what the adult film industry calls a “facial?”
  • A rope walked into a bar. . .
  • A popcorn vendor asks the customer whether he would like his popcorn sweet or salty… The customer gazes lovingly at his girlfriend and replies “I want it like her”
  • A fireman was working on the engine outside the station when he noticed a little girl nearby in a red wagon.
  • What do lice say when they feel they’ve overstayed their welcome?
  • Missing his son
  • How I want to die
  • Dirty lil’ Johnny.. (I hope its a new one)
  • The experimental surgery
  • Three men are captured by cannibals.
  • A castaway sees a ship, but watches it sinks, leaving one survivor in the water.
  • A man died and was met at the pearly gates of Heaven by St. Peter himself
  • Emergency Room
  • Why don’t violinists play hide-n-seek?
  • I don’t know if 6 is afraid of 7 anymore
  • Just turned 37…
  • I call my dick “Dirty Jobs”
  • Cop: License and registration. Do you know why I stopped you?
  • I asked the librarian if they had any books on amplifiers.
  • What do you call an excellent French lesbian?
  • Where does Billy Joel perform when he’s in Beijing?
  • NYC bars
  • I was the knight no one expected to see on the battlefield that day!
  • And now a word from our sponsor, Royer & Associates Shipbuilding Inc.
  • My therapist thought I was a communist
  • A tourist is hiking through the Scottish Highlands and stops to take a drink from a stream.
  • A man walks home from work.
  • Everyone at the autopsy club is excited
  • What do you say to a gross sheep? Ewwwwwwe
  • What should you prepare in case of trick-or-treating cats?
  • Why did the skeleton go to the hospital?
  • Famous last words…
  • Every night, this guy would stumble home blind drunk and lose his dinner right there in the kitchen sink.
  • Everyone told Beethoven he would never be a composer because he was deaf.
  • A lion was walking through the savanna. He comes across a boar.
  • I don’t want to brag, but I made 6 figures last year
  • A giraffe was walking through the jungle…
  • What do you call a duck that graduates at the top of its class?
  • An Englishman goes to a Chinese tailor
  • When Beethoven passed away
  • My wife hates that I’m always making urination jokes. She said she feels like her opinion doesn’t matter to me.

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