I said, Let's see, mercury is in uranus right now. He said, I am not in this astrology stuff. Me: Me neither, my thermometer just broke. Joke Poo: The Plumber’s Horoscope My…
One day the teacher told her class to think of something exiting that happened recently.
Little Suzie told about her trip to Florida. Clyde said his dad got drunk all the time. Little Johnny put a dot on the board and the teacher asked him to explain…
In a small town there was a couple, known for being unafraid to express their love in a simple action.
A man and his wife were deeply in love, always holding hands, on the couch, on the bed, in public and in private. They expressed their feelings through this simple action for…
These tropical birds stole my beer…
Two cans. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" version: Joke Poo: These Garden Gnomes Stole My Sausage These garden gnomes stole my sausage… Two links. Okay, let’s analyze this joke:…
The Sentence
An 80 year old man is brought before the court for shoplifting. This was his third offense and the sentencing guidelines called for a sentence of 15 to 20 years. The judge…
Good news/bad news
Doctor: I have good news and bad news. Patient: Oh no! What’s the bad news? Doctor: Yoy only have three months to live. Patient: Oh wow – so what’s the good news…
Bad luck Dave
There was a guy named Dave, whose life was just a long string of bad luck. Lost jobs, broken phones, every vending machine he touched ate his money. The guy even got…
I’m a stay at home dad and I started a daycare.
When one of the parents was picking up their kid they commented,”Did you get the idea for this from that movie?” I said,”I did!” They go,”Oh my god! I loved Daddy Daycare!”…
Prayer
The husband tells the wife that he is going to a 3-day church conference. Wife packs his bag, prepares breakfast for him and says, “Darling, let’s pray together before you leave.” Husband…
A new cave has been opened in hell
The souls of people who worked their whole lives without vacations, dutifully paid their loans, didn’t steal, didn’t protest, didn’t break the rules – that’s exactly where they end up. One devil…