Upon arriving home, a husband was urgently met at the door by his crying wife. Crashing into his arms she sobbed: "It's the pharmacist. He insulted me terribly this morning on the…
A society woman receives a parrot as a gift. She quickly teaches the parrot to announce the various guests who arrive at her many parties. As Mr. and Mrs. Smith arrive, the parrot would say, “Introducing Mr. and Mrs. Smith.” As Mr. and Mrs. Jones arrived, the parrot would say, “In
Unfortunately, the parrot has a well-developed libido, and starts sneaking out of the house and screwing the neighbor's prize pigeons. The neighbor complains, and the woman warns the parrot that if he…
Three lawyers end up dead.
God asks the first two what they've done. The first says, "I helped the rich put innocents in danger," and is sent to hell. The second says, "I helped the rich evade…
Pastor driving home with his 6 yr old son
A pastor is driving home after services one day with his son in the front passenger seat. His son being 6 is starting to ask questions about everything he notices, and he…
John goes to his buddy Steve and confesses to sleeping with the wife of his friend, Alan
"Steve, do me a favor and keep Alan busy at the bar for a few hours, will ya?" John asks. Steve doesn't like it, but being a friend he reluctantly agrees. Steve…
A woman takes her 18 -year-old daughter to the doctor.
Doctor: Okay, Mrs. O'Hara, what’s the problem? Mom: It’s my daughter, Bernadette. She keeps getting these crazy food cravings, she’s putting on weight, and most mornings she’s sick. The doctor gives Bernadette…
A man goes to see the Pope. “Your Holiness. I work for KFC, and we’ll offer you ten million dollars to change the reading of the Lord’s Prayer from ‘Give us this day our daily bread’ to ‘Give us this day our daily chicken.'”
The Pope is aghast. "I can't just go changing God's word for money!" The man says, "Fifty million! Now, think of all the good the church could do with all that money,…
A biology teacher is explaining flowers to her young students.
"Children," she says, "it's important to know that the stamen and the pistil are the reproductive organs of a flower." From the back of the class, Little Johnny's eyes go wide and…
The other day my girlfriend told me she needed a laugh.
So I showed her my pay stub. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” riffing on your pay stub joke, titled “Mascot Mishap”: Title: Mascot Mishap The other day, the high…
Daughters Premonitions
A Father puts his 3 year old daughter to bed, tells her a story and listens to her prayers which she ends by saying, "God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, God bless…