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There was a farmer who hated aphids destroying crops

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

He yelled “go fuck yourselves” and they grew in numbers Okay, here’s my "Joke Poo" version of the farmer and aphids joke: Joke Poo: The Complimenting Compost There was a gardener who…

What’s the best smelling ant

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

Deoder-ant Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on the deodorant ant joke: Joke Poo: What’s the Most Self-Absorbed Cloud? Stratosphere-centric. Alright, let’s get our magnifying glass and comedic tweezers…

My wife said that for our next love making session, she’d like to re-enact a movie she recently watched.

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

28 Years Later Okay, I’ll give it a shot. Original Joke: My wife said that for our next love making session, she’d like to re-enact a movie she recently watched. 28 Years…

I once taught an essay-writing class to inmates

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

It had its prose and cons. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on your original: Joke Poo: Code Brown I once managed the IT department for a daycare… It…

I just came up with a new business idea!

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

Renting out equipment for safe autoerotic asphyxiation. I'm calling it AirBRB! Joke Poo: I just came up with a new service for gardeners! Renting out trained, miniature badgers to safely and efficiently…

If Americans smile

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

Does that mean that the rest of the world skilometer? Okay, here’s the original joke, followed by my attempt at a "Joke Poo" version, titled accordingly: Original Joke: If Americans smile, does…

Why are there no cats on Mars?

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

Because Curiosity is there! Joke Poo: Original Joke: Why are there no cats on Mars? Because Curiosity is there! Joke Poo Title: Why are there no toilets in space? New Joke: Why…

I saw a frog on a log, and I couldn’t look away

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

It was ribbiting. Okay, here’s my "Joke Poo" version of that joke: Joke Poo: Number Two I found a deuce behind the spruce, and I couldn’t believe my eyes. It was a…

The mayor wanted to get more townspeople to attend the city council meetings.

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

One council member suggested bringing in a hypnotist to do a show for everyone. They thought it was a great idea. A few weeks later, the town hall was packed, and the…

Good news! I just received notification of my new job at the post office.

Posted on June 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

I start last week! Joke Poo: I.T. Support Good news! I just got the notification that I’m starting my new I.T. support job. I started last year! Alright, let’s break down this…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • “I’d like to see your lunch menu”, I told the waiter
  • I accidentally spilled a bottle of glue all over my vacation itinerary.
  • So after 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife went to see a therapist.
  • The Madam opened the brothel door in New York
  • The teacher asked little Johnny if he knew his numbers.
  • I just found out my wife has a twin sister.
  • Jesus and the old man…
  • What do you call a paper airplane that doesn’t fly?
  • A Wife Asks a Question to Her Husband
  • I bought a pack of biscuits, on the side it said, “Eat me big boy.”
  • What is a wok?
  • Racism exists in the oceanographic community.
  • Why are you right handed?
  • How does Lightning McQueen masturbate?
  • I recently found out they don’t have the real Mona Lisa in the Louvre
  • I saw a woman wearing short shorts that had a NASCAR logo.
  • A redneck had just been served in a Las Vegas cocktail lounge
  • An engineer wakes up in hell and thinks to himself. I’ve been a good person. I shouldn’t be here.
  • Two teenage church-goers get married.
  • As I walked into work this morning my colleague said, “Dave, you look like shit.”
  • A guy picks up a woman at a bar. After a couple of drinks they go to his place…
  • My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic..
  • The boss was confused when one of his most reliable employees didn’t show up for work.
  • A man is doing 20 over the speed limit on the highway when a cop pulls him over.
  • Accent misjudged
  • The speeding biker
  • My boss told me to have a good day…
  • Came up with this one while sitting in traffic: What’s a whiskey drinkers favorite car?
  • What do you call a cow with no legs?
  • An older couple were lying in bed one night.
  • At dinner, little Timmy was asked by his father to lead the prayer.
  • A joke I made up in third grade: How does a skunk protect himself from danger?
  • Captain Kirk. Peter Pan. Lestat De Lioncourt. Miss Marple. Don Draper. The Three Little Pigs. Robin Hood. Daffy Duck. Optimus Prime. Bilbo Baggins. Count Dracula. Han Solo. Jack and Diane. Elmo. Pikachu. Jean Valjean. Snow White.
  • A joke for reddit
  • A husband and wife were celebrating their 50th anniversary.
  • I said to the doctor “That haemorrhoid cream you prescribed for me is causing some unpleasant reactions”.
  • A woman hits a chicken as it’s crossing the road.
  • A 50yo Woman Goes in for Cancer Surgery
  • “Son, I found a condom in your room.”
  • Interviewer: “How much amount of milk does your cow produce?”. Farmer: “Which one, black one or white one?”
  • MENSA has started administering a new type of test that scans your social media posts determine your functional IQ.
  • A woman cheats on her husband
  • Hello, you have reached the Men’s Help Line, my name is Bob. How can I help you?
  • A man rubs a magic lamp, and a genie appears.
  • A Guy Meets An Actor
  • Frank and the Chili Cook off
  • On his first day at work, an apprentice butcher was ordered to chop up some rabbit carcasses for display in the shop window.
  • Why did the condom fly across the room?
  • When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue
  • “Pain” denotes the ache an Englishman feels

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