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The easy part of curing erectile dysfunction is diet and exercise.

Posted on June 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

The hard part of curing erectile dysfunction is convincing your wife to diet and exercise. Joke Poo: The Art Critic The easy part of writing a scathing art critique is flowery language…

I recently dropped 8 1/2 pounds

Posted on June 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

I hope my friend’s baby is OK Okay, I’ll play along. Here’s your "Joke Poo" version, riffing on the original: Joke Poo: The Compost Heap I recently added 12 cubic feet of…

Smoked some cannabis. Made up a little poem.

Posted on June 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

Called it a high-ku. Okay, here’s my attempt, playing on the same pun structure: Joke Poo: Late Night Code Stayed up coding late. Wrote a function so tight. Called it "a bug…

Why do surgeons make you count down when they administer anesthesia?

Posted on June 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

To make you number. Joke Poo: Why Do Plumbers…? Original Joke: Why do surgeons make you count down when they administer anesthesia? To make you number. Joke Poo: Why do plumbers make…

An older couple were lying in bed one night.

Posted on June 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

The husband was falling asleep but the wife was in a romantic mood and wanted to talk. She said: “You used to hold my hand when we were courting.” Wearily he reached…

A woman finds a gnome hiding in her house during winter

Posted on June 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

She tries to shoo the gnome out with a broom, and it says "I'm not going out there, it's bloody cold!" The woman says "I don't care! Go find a tree or…

There’s three guys who have/had business at a whorehouse this day…

Posted on June 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

One guy is in the whorehouse. One guy is headed there and the other guy is headed home. What are their nationalities? The one headed home is Finnish The one headed there…

fuck, you are so tight…

Posted on June 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

I whisper as I do my budget for the month Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on your original: Joke Poo: Sticky Situation "Damn, this is so firm…" I…

Did you hear that Lorraina Bobbitt died in a car accident?

Posted on June 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

Some dick cut her off Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on the Lorraina Bobbitt joke, retitled and hopefully carrying a similar (albeit dark) comedic energy: Joke Poo: The…

Last night, I had a dream that I was swimming in an ocean full of orange soda.

Posted on June 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

But when I woke up, I realized it was just a Fanta sea Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on your example: Joke Poo: Last Night’s Dumpster Dive Last…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • What do you call a cow with no legs?
  • An older couple were lying in bed one night.
  • At dinner, little Timmy was asked by his father to lead the prayer.
  • A joke I made up in third grade: How does a skunk protect himself from danger?
  • Captain Kirk. Peter Pan. Lestat De Lioncourt. Miss Marple. Don Draper. The Three Little Pigs. Robin Hood. Daffy Duck. Optimus Prime. Bilbo Baggins. Count Dracula. Han Solo. Jack and Diane. Elmo. Pikachu. Jean Valjean. Snow White.
  • A joke for reddit
  • A husband and wife were celebrating their 50th anniversary.
  • I said to the doctor “That haemorrhoid cream you prescribed for me is causing some unpleasant reactions”.
  • A woman hits a chicken as it’s crossing the road.
  • A 50yo Woman Goes in for Cancer Surgery
  • “Son, I found a condom in your room.”
  • Interviewer: “How much amount of milk does your cow produce?”. Farmer: “Which one, black one or white one?”
  • MENSA has started administering a new type of test that scans your social media posts determine your functional IQ.
  • A woman cheats on her husband
  • Hello, you have reached the Men’s Help Line, my name is Bob. How can I help you?
  • A man rubs a magic lamp, and a genie appears.
  • A Guy Meets An Actor
  • Frank and the Chili Cook off
  • On his first day at work, an apprentice butcher was ordered to chop up some rabbit carcasses for display in the shop window.
  • Why did the condom fly across the room?
  • When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue
  • “Pain” denotes the ache an Englishman feels
  • A Bishop, a Pope and Mother Superior are standing at the gates of Heaven.
  • I wanted to be a CEO
  • I was asked (in front of my girlfriend) what I would have done in the position of the CEO at the Coldplay concert. I said I’d never be in that situation!
  • On the news today it said they’ve unearthed a sarcophagus in Egypt filled with chocolate and nuts
  • So a guy comes home extremely pissed off. “What’s the matter, honey?” asks his wife.
  • Three very different couples want to get married at the same church!
  • A couple of guys are at the bar. The first guy says to his buddy, “My wife just admitted to me that she’s been having an affair with Bob the mailman.”
  • A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years.
  • 3 nuns are standing at the gates of heaven, St Peter says they’ll be allowed in if they can each answer a single question
  • My BDSM society took me to court for not being hardcore enough.
  • A tourist goes to a restaurant in Madrid and orders the special. When it comes, he asks what it is.
  • What do orgasms and sneezing have in common?
  • A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced five husbands.
  • It’s early fall, Joe is out raking leaves…
  • I said to my wife, “Sit down, I’ve got something to tell you.”
  • A British Police Officer Is Walking Along Side an American Officer When They Spot An 18-Year-Old Casually Resting on Heavy Duty Sniper Rifle, Sipping A Beer in the Front Yard.
  • A cowboy rode into town and decided to stop by the local saloon for a drink.
  • I watched a porno flick about a sex competition, and couldn’t decide who I wanted to win.
  • What is the difference between a snowman and a snow woman?
  • I said to my therapist “I’ve been feeling ultra paranoid lately”
  • The Butcher Dance
  • Dear Tech Support, Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0
  • A teacher and his engineering students were given free plane tickets to go on a field trip.
  • “55 northern 9th” the guy was told, “best blowjob ever.” So he goes there.
  • My girlfriend phoned me on her way to work and said to me “I saw a fox on the way to work”
  • Guy walks in to the E.R and says: “Doctor I’m shrinking!”
  • A Calvinist dies and goes to heaven.
  • The billionaire and the mermaid whisperer

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