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At my check-up, the very elderly doctor looked at my chart and said, “Ah, April 18… we share a birthday. Fellow Capricorns!” I said, “Uh, Doc, you meant Aries.”

Posted on June 25, 2025 by Joke Poo

He nodded and said, “Ah yes, I love those. Especially the crime ones on Netflix!” Joke Poo: At the Coffee Shop At the cafe, the hipster barista, adjusting his oversized glasses, looked…

What a country! If they find gold or oil in my backyard, it belongs to the state!

Posted on June 25, 2025 by Joke Poo

But if they find marijuana, then it's mine?? Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on your original: Joke Poo: The Crypto Mine What a decentralized future! If I discover…

The grocery store boy asked me, “paper or plastic”. I told him I didn’t care and told him to choose for me. He said he couldn’t do that…

Posted on June 25, 2025 by Joke Poo

Baggers can’t be choosers. Okay, here’s a new joke based on your provided joke, with the title "Joke Poo" and altering a key element while maintaining a similar comedic structure: Joke Poo…

Buck was having a tough time with his pig farm

Posted on June 25, 2025 by Joke Poo

His pigs just weren't breeding. One day, his friend Chucky stopped by. After a quick chat, Chucky recommended, "This natural breeding thing doesn't work anymore! You have to try artificial insemination on…

Did you hear about the Nun who started listening to Linkin Park?

Posted on June 25, 2025 by Joke Poo

She's Breaking the Habit tonight. Okay, here’s my "Joke Poo" version of the Nun and Linkin Park joke: Joke Poo: The Plumber’s Playlist Did you hear about the Plumber who started listening…

Hot out

Posted on June 24, 2025 by Joke Poo

It was so hot out today, I saw two fire hydrants fighting over a dog. Okay, here’s a new joke riffing on the "Hot Out" joke, titled "Joke Poo": Joke Poo It…

Why did the woman use a gold diaphragm?

Posted on June 24, 2025 by Joke Poo

She wanted her man to come into money. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on your original joke, maintaining a similar structure but with a different premise and punchline:…

How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a construction worker?

Posted on June 24, 2025 by Joke Poo

Ask them to pronounce "unionised". Okay, I’ll take the chemist/construction worker joke and give it a "Joke Poo" makeover. Title: Joke Poo – The Cloud Architect How do you tell the difference…

On a scale of 1 to 10 how poor are you?

Posted on June 24, 2025 by Joke Poo

I don't even have a scale. Okay, here’s my "Joke Poo" version, titled "Toilet Troubles": Toilet Troubles On a scale of 1 to 10, how clogged is your toilet? …I don’t even…

How Hot Is It?

Posted on June 24, 2025 by Joke Poo

Well, yesterday I saw a bird blow on a worm before he ate it! Joke Poo: How Wired Is It? Well, yesterday I saw a self-driving car stop at a charging station……

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • Interviewer: “How much amount of milk does your cow produce?”. Farmer: “Which one, black one or white one?”
  • MENSA has started administering a new type of test that scans your social media posts determine your functional IQ.
  • A woman cheats on her husband
  • Hello, you have reached the Men’s Help Line, my name is Bob. How can I help you?
  • A man rubs a magic lamp, and a genie appears.
  • A Guy Meets An Actor
  • Frank and the Chili Cook off
  • On his first day at work, an apprentice butcher was ordered to chop up some rabbit carcasses for display in the shop window.
  • Why did the condom fly across the room?
  • When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue
  • “Pain” denotes the ache an Englishman feels
  • A Bishop, a Pope and Mother Superior are standing at the gates of Heaven.
  • I wanted to be a CEO
  • I was asked (in front of my girlfriend) what I would have done in the position of the CEO at the Coldplay concert. I said I’d never be in that situation!
  • On the news today it said they’ve unearthed a sarcophagus in Egypt filled with chocolate and nuts
  • So a guy comes home extremely pissed off. “What’s the matter, honey?” asks his wife.
  • Three very different couples want to get married at the same church!
  • A couple of guys are at the bar. The first guy says to his buddy, “My wife just admitted to me that she’s been having an affair with Bob the mailman.”
  • A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years.
  • 3 nuns are standing at the gates of heaven, St Peter says they’ll be allowed in if they can each answer a single question
  • My BDSM society took me to court for not being hardcore enough.
  • A tourist goes to a restaurant in Madrid and orders the special. When it comes, he asks what it is.
  • What do orgasms and sneezing have in common?
  • A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced five husbands.
  • It’s early fall, Joe is out raking leaves…
  • I said to my wife, “Sit down, I’ve got something to tell you.”
  • A British Police Officer Is Walking Along Side an American Officer When They Spot An 18-Year-Old Casually Resting on Heavy Duty Sniper Rifle, Sipping A Beer in the Front Yard.
  • A cowboy rode into town and decided to stop by the local saloon for a drink.
  • I watched a porno flick about a sex competition, and couldn’t decide who I wanted to win.
  • What is the difference between a snowman and a snow woman?
  • I said to my therapist “I’ve been feeling ultra paranoid lately”
  • The Butcher Dance
  • Dear Tech Support, Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0
  • A teacher and his engineering students were given free plane tickets to go on a field trip.
  • “55 northern 9th” the guy was told, “best blowjob ever.” So he goes there.
  • My girlfriend phoned me on her way to work and said to me “I saw a fox on the way to work”
  • Guy walks in to the E.R and says: “Doctor I’m shrinking!”
  • A Calvinist dies and goes to heaven.
  • The billionaire and the mermaid whisperer
  • One day, the wife comes home with a spectacular diamond ring.
  • A woman asks her husband at breakfast time!
  • I used to go out with a girl who punched me in the face when she orgasmed.
  • You know you’re getting old when…
  • Men lie about their height all the way through their lives; from their twenties…
  • What does it mean if a guy can remember a girls eye color after a first date?
  • What do you call somebody who’s into fast cars but questioning their sexuality?
  • It must been the bagel – short joke
  • Job Interview
  • A woman with a passion for gardening was growing increasingly frustrated.
  • Have you heard the joke about gaslighting?

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