My wife's family thinks the only reason I married her is because her Uncle died and left her lots and lots of money. THAT IS NOT TRUE. I would have married this…
Taylor’s Album Was Removed From The Google Play Store
They said it was written entirely in Swift, and therefore incompatible with Android. Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version of the Taylor Swift joke, aiming for a similar structure and surprise element:…
The guy who picked on me all through high school and then became a millionaire just placed a delivery order at my local KFC.
Now I get the last laugh. I gave him original recipe and he ordered extra crispy. Checkmate John, you fucking loser. Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version, riffing on your KFC revenge…
3 men each sentenced to years for their crimes are riding together in the bus to the prison.
The guard riding along asks them how they will pass their time. The first one shows them a book about becoming a minister and tells the others he will be in prison…
My 8 yr old sons joke
I’m FaceTiming my son and he says Son: Dad, what’s the difference between a piano, a tuna, and a glue? Me: What? Son:You can tune a piano but you can’t tuna fish….
Tonight while I was grilling steaks for dinner, my son said, “Dad, one day I will help you with bills, groceries and rent.”
My eyes teared up. He'll be 37 next week. Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version of the steak grilling joke, titled “The Legacy of Leeks”: Joke Poo: The Legacy of Leeks Tonight,…
A guy joins a monastery and takes a vow of silence: he’s allowed to say two words every seven years. After the first seven years, the elders bring him in and ask for his two words. “Cold floors,” he says. They nod and send him away.
Seven more years pass. They bring him back in and ask for his two words. He clears his throats and says, "Bad food." They nod and send him away. Seven more years…
I was standing at the bar of Terminal 2 Heathrow when this small Chinese guy came in, stood next to me, and started drinking a beer.
I asked him, "Do you know any martial arts, like Kung-Fu, Karate, or Ju-Jitsu?" “No..” he replied and then seemingly offended he added “Why the fuck would you ask me that? Is…
Two dwarfs got married and went home after the wedding.
The bride was very excited for the first night and also a bit scared. So, she asked her best friend to stay over at their house that night, listen at their bedroom…
I went to a Monorchids Anonymous meeting
Everyone had a ball Okay, here’s a new joke based on your Monorchids Anonymous joke, aiming for a similar structure and a surprising punchline: Joke Poo: Hemorrhoids Support Group I went to…