The bartender says they only allow service animals, not emotional support animals wearing a $25 yellow vest you can buy on Etsy. On top of that, it’s dangerous to others. So the…
A man climbs the mountain seeking wisdom from the Wise Man
He gets to the peak and sees the Wise Man with a long white beard and wearing orange robes, sitting with his legs crossed at the summit. The Wise Man says, "What…
I just had sex for the first time since I broke up with my ex-boyfriend Scott.
I got off Scott-free. Joke Poo: I Just Made Soup for the First Time Since I Broke Up With My Ex-Chef, Claude. I got off Claude-free… but it was pretty bland. Alright,…
People in Los Angeles really hate hockey
There's whole crowds of them yelling "No Kings!" and "No ice in LA!" Okay, here’s my "Joke Poo" version of that joke: Joke Poo: Techies Hate Potting Soil People in Silicon Valley…
To help with my outbursts at home, my anger-management therapist suggested renaming my kids to “Just $1.99” and “Only $2.99”.
I was like, “Hmmm….those prices are hard to beat.” Okay, here’s a new joke riffing on the pricing/value theme of the original, titled "Joke Poo": Joke Poo: To help curb my late-night…
Why does the United States still use the Imperial measurement system?
Because they have a “foot” fetish. Joke Poo: Why do dogs sniff each other’s butts? Because they have a "scent" of humor. Okay, let’s dissect this joke: Elements: Setup: "Why does the…
A new neighbor moves into the largest house on the street.
John, The un-official "Head" of the neighborhood, goes over to great the new guy. "Hello there, friend, I'm John. What's your name?" He asks. "My name's Alex. Pleased to meet you, John."…
A guy walks into a bar and freezes when he sees a horse behind the counter
Suddenly the horse actually talks and says "You seem surprised?" And the guy says "I am. Did the cow sell the place?" Joke Poo: The Compost Crisis A farmer walks into his…
A man entered the confessional and told his priest, “I almost had an affair with another woman.”
The priest said, "What do you mean, almost?" The man said, "Well, we took our clothes off and rubbed against each other, but then I stopped!" The priest said, "Rubbing against each…
The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers.
Suzie Smith stood and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Tom, had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The…