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A widower goes to a psychic to contact his late wife. “Honey,” he says. “Are you happy?”

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

“Yes, my husband,” she says. Relieved, the man asks, “Are you happier than when you were with me?” “Yes, my husband,” she replies, “I’m much, much happier.” The husband smiles. “Heaven must…

New Zealand would be so safe in case of a world war

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

It's not even on the map! Okay, here’s the original joke: New Zealand would be so safe in case of a world war because it’s not even on the map! And here’s…

A guy walks into a pharmacy and asks, “Do you have any antiseptics here?”

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

The clerk says, "Absolutely not, we're very respectful of the Jewish community." Joke Poo: A Programmer’s Predicament A programmer walks into a therapist’s office and asks, "Do you have any debugging techniques…

I spent a whole year making a belt out of clocks for a fat guy.

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

It was a huge waist of time. Okay, here’s my attempt: Joke Poo: The Diaper Genie’s Lament I spent a whole month coding a smart sensor that automatically composes haikus based on…

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

It didn't. It got ran over. Joke Poo: Why Did the Landlord Cross the Line? He didn’t. He just raised the rent across the line. Alright, let’s break down this morbid twist…

Knock knock

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

Who's there? Do you want two CDs. Do I want two CDs who? Do you want two CDs nuts? (Do you want to see Deez Nuts?) Okay, here’s my attempt at a…

Charley Pride was a legendary musician

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

But I don't understand why he gets a whole month Okay, here’s a "Joke Poo" riffing on the Charley Pride joke: Joke Poo: The Toilet Paper Conundrum Title: Andrex Appreciation Month Andrex…

Women are confusing. On my wife’s birthday, I wish her a Happy Birthday and she smiles happily at me

Posted on June 6, 2025 by Joke Poo

The following day I wish her a Happy After-birthday and she calls me a sick bastard. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" titled "Data’s Delicate Dance": Title: Data’s Delicate Dance…

I’m AM going to put glue on my hands and then handle firearms. Nobody can tell me otherwise.

Posted on June 6, 2025 by Joke Poo

I’m sticking to my guns! Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" riffing on the original glue-on-hands joke: Title: Joke Poo – Fiber Optic Follies I’m going to spend all day…

Why did Shakespeare only use quills

Posted on June 6, 2025 by Joke Poo

Pencils confused him.2B or not 2B Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on your Shakespeare joke: Joke Poo: Why Did Dr. Frankenstein Struggle with Plumbing? He kept asking if…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • Young woman gets tired of guys her age who couldn’t afford any nice restaurants.
  • I went to the doctor for my prostate exam.
  • Linda was well over thirty, but still completely flat-chested.
  • A man named pun walks into a room and ten people are found dead afterwards after he left
  • What is the fear of seeing all species of donkeys at once called?
  • How do New Zealanders find sheep in tall grass.
  • A 104-year-old man is being interviewed on the news.
  • How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish man?
  • Drinking buddies
  • A demon runs a factory in Hell, and has a bunch of underlings working for it.
  • A priest …
  • How did Alan Greenspan answer his wife when she asked him “do these jeans make me look fat?”
  • What the rudest elf that works for Santa?
  • Did you hear about the guy who was sexually aroused by envelopes?
  • I like my women, just like how I like my laptop
  • Why does spider-man have such snappy comebacks?
  • My over weight friend had a heart attack while he orgasmed….
  • Starting a new website for d*ck pics
  • I can’t believe how well I’m accepting my husband’s small manhood.
  • At a meeting, the corporate manager told a joke.
  • George staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Henry.
  • A Boeing 777 was lumbering along at just under 500 mph.
  • A woman doesn’t come home one night. The next day she tells her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend’s house. The husband calls his wife’s 10 best friends. None of them know anything about it.
  • God is speaking to Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden
  • One day while he was building a barn
  • What do you call a cat, that gets away with a crime?
  • So Schrödinger’s cat walks into a bar
  • God forgot something !
  • I’m writing a musical about an exchange student who becomes a nanny in Canada and garners a following when she blogs about it. It’s called…
  • A drunk walks up to a cop
  • What’s the difference between light an hard?
  • Why did the nose wear a condom?
  • Don’t try to understand women
  • Why did the banana go to the doctor?
  • A guy gets pulled over for speeding down a highway
  • I like my women like I like my coffee….
  • The Hokey Pokey Killer decided to stop being a serial killer and start being an upstanding member of society.
  • Why did the visually-impaired man fall into the well?
  • Two hunters charter a hydroplane to take them out into the wilderness.
  • Ms Universe final question: What are your thoughts on the male sex organ?
  • A woman grants her mother’s unusual dying wish.
  • A blonde driving a car became lost in a snowstorm.
  • my doctor told me i have a rare condition that causes my anus to produce sugar
  • A redneck tells his buddy, “I got my COVID test results today, it says 50. I don’t know what that means.”
  • I need tell my girlfriend she’s using way too much teeth when she goes down on me, but I don’t want to hurt her feelings.
  • What’s the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea?
  • How do you cancel an appointment at the sperm bank?
  • Where does a rainbow go to jail?
  • Why is 10 always afraid?
  • Life is like a wiener

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