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U2 was playing a show in Glasgow…

Posted on June 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

…at the end of Beautiful Day, Bono shushes the crowd and starts snapping his fingers into the microphone, "snap….snap…..snap…." The crowd quiets, "….snap…..snap…" Bono speaks into the mic, keeping the snapping of…

Pun enters a room, kills 10 people

Posted on June 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

Pun in, 10 dead Okay, here’s my attempt, riffing on the "Pun enters a room…" joke: Joke Poo: Dad Joke’s Day Off Dad Joke enters a room, kills all conversation. Alright, let’s…

When Anakin’s mom died he became…

Posted on June 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

Little Orphan Ani. Okay, here’s my attempt: Joke Poo: When Vader’s digestive system gave out, he became… …Constipated Darkness. Okay, let’s break down that joke and then try to build upon it….

I’m learning electric guitar but I can only practice Sunday mornings…

Posted on June 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

…I’m getting a lot of feedback. Okay, here’s my "Joke Poo" version: Joke Poo: Compost Blues I’m trying to start a worm composting bin, but I can only add kitchen scraps on…

A priest fresh out of seminary was to conduct his first mass in his new parish and was extremely nervous.

Posted on June 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

The monsignor gave him a bit of advice. "Just take some vodka up in your water glass and take a sip when you're nervous". So the priest did just that. He had…

I visited the birthplace of the man who invented the toothbrush.

Posted on June 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

There was no plaque. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on your toothbrush inventor joke: Joke Poo: The Compost Heap I visited the final resting place of the farmer…

My dad asked if I knew why he called me son…

Posted on June 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

He said "Because you're so bright". Honest to God he did this multiple times a week. Okay, here’s my "Joke Poo" version, playing on the setup of a father using the same…

I’ve always been more impressed with living music creators.

Posted on June 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

The dead ones can only decompose. Okay, here’s my "Joke Poo" based on your original, titled as requested: Joke Poo: The Recycled Joke I’ve always been more impressed with current meme creators….

The diagnosis

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

A man who recently visted the doctor was sitting around and waiting for a call with his results. After a few days he gets a call from the doctor. Sounding a bit…

A pirate walks into a bar…

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

He looks like a stereotypical grizzled old sea dog, with a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and an eyepatch. It's a pretty slow day at the bar, without much custom…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • Don’t try to understand women
  • Why did the banana go to the doctor?
  • A guy gets pulled over for speeding down a highway
  • I like my women like I like my coffee….
  • The Hokey Pokey Killer decided to stop being a serial killer and start being an upstanding member of society.
  • Why did the visually-impaired man fall into the well?
  • Two hunters charter a hydroplane to take them out into the wilderness.
  • Ms Universe final question: What are your thoughts on the male sex organ?
  • A woman grants her mother’s unusual dying wish.
  • A blonde driving a car became lost in a snowstorm.
  • my doctor told me i have a rare condition that causes my anus to produce sugar
  • A redneck tells his buddy, “I got my COVID test results today, it says 50. I don’t know what that means.”
  • I need tell my girlfriend she’s using way too much teeth when she goes down on me, but I don’t want to hurt her feelings.
  • What’s the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea?
  • How do you cancel an appointment at the sperm bank?
  • Where does a rainbow go to jail?
  • Why is 10 always afraid?
  • Life is like a wiener
  • Doctor: “I believe you are suffering from a severe case of déjà vu”
  • If you can think of a better fish joke..
  • The hardest things to say in life…
  • It’s my birthday…
  • I recently learned a scientific fact about pigeons… They often die after mating.
  • Regrettably, the scientist who pioneered the concept of wind chill has passed away
  • Stranded in an island with Gisele Bundchen
  • This ad actually ran in the Atlanta Journal
  • Does anyone know if its possible to take a skin graft from your buttocks and put it on somebody who isn’t family?
  • Jim my husband and I went into town and visited a shop.
  • A woman with small boobies buys a finely carved mirror at an antique shop.
  • [NSFW]People who write “burro” when they mean “burrow”
  • Threesome.
  • A cop is driving down the street when he sees a woman walking toward him with her right breast hanging out of her shirt.
  • Two men and one woman from different nations are stranded on an island
  • What do you call a group of snakes getting to together to talk smack about their owners?
  • Yo mama so clumsy
  • Man sits down at the bar and orders…
  • Two caterpillars are trying to escape from a pursuing spider…
  • What has five toes, but isn’t your foot?
  • Why did the Rebels in Star Wars go metric?
  • It was five o’clock, and the shift at the coal mine was over
  • A man doesn’t know the meaning of true happiness until he gets married.
  • “I’ve been talking to supernatural entities for years, and they are trying to seduce me,” I told my doctor.
  • When we were first married my wife had the body of a supermodel
  • A redneck goes to the doctor for a physical. “I need stool sample, a urine sample, and a sperm sample,” says the doctor.
  • Omar Epps moved nextdoor to Chris Hemsworth.
  • A drunk man is refused service at a bar, so he tries to sneak in through different doors
  • Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. I’ve been with a loose girl.
  • Bubba and Billy Bob were known for having below average IQ around Little Rock.
  • Son: “Mom, all the kids in the school are making fun of me because I am still a virgin.”
  • My husband and i have a secret to making our marriage last.

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