Skip to content
Joke Poo
Menu
  • Home
    • The Enduring Power of a Good Joke
  • Categories
    • Totally Feckin random
    • Why Did
    • Long
    • Wife
    • Walks into a bar
    • Dog
    • Bartender
    • Husband
    • Doctor
    • Chicken
  • Privacy Policy
Menu
Fake Poo

The answer is 1.5. What is the question?

Posted on June 22, 2025 by Joke Poo

When introducing himself, how many times will James Bond say his own name?

Okay, here’s my "Joke Poo" based on your given joke, trying to maintain a similar structure and comedic feel:

Joke Poo: Lost in Space

The navigation system displayed "Destination: Proxima Centauri b. Distance: 4.2 light-years." What is the time taken to get there?

Answer: 1.5

Why?

When the ship’s AI self destructs, how many times will Commander Zorp yell "Danger, Will Robinson, Danger!"

Alright, let’s break down this joke.

Deconstruction:

  • Core Structure: It’s a riddle presented in a question-answer format. The humor lies in the unexpected arithmetic angle to a character-related question.
  • Key Elements:
    • The Answer (1.5): This is the key to unlocking the riddle.
    • James Bond: A globally recognized fictional spy, famous for introducing himself in a specific, iconic manner.
    • The Question (Introducing Himself): Focuses on the act of James Bond presenting his identity.
    • "How many times will James Bond say his own name?" This prompt is what sets up the question.

Assumptions Made by the Riddle:

  • The joke anticipates the solver will know the common James Bond catchphrase is "Bond, James Bond".
  • It relies on wordplay, specifically dividing the two instances of his name, "James Bond," to arrive at 1.5.

Comedic Enrichment – Building Upon the Joke:

Now, let’s build a new piece of humor based on this foundation. I will provide a ‘Did You Know’ fact and a new joke that are Bond-adjacent:

Did You Know?:

Did you know that in "Dr. No," (1962) James Bond, played by Sean Connery, wasn’t actually the one who said, "Bond, James Bond"? It was actually voiced by actor Nikki van der Zyl who overdubbed the line. So, technically, the number of times Bond actually said "Bond, James Bond" in the first Bond film is…Zero!

New Joke:

Why did James Bond bring a calculator to his introduction?

Because he wanted to be absolutely sure he divided his name correctly. He couldn’t afford to be "James Point Seven Five Bond," that doesn’t sound suave at all.

Explanation of New Joke:

This joke directly builds on the original. The "calculator" element alludes to the arithmetical aspect of the riddle. The punchline emphasizes the absurdity of being a fraction of James Bond, highlighting the importance of precision, both in Bond’s actions and in the original riddle’s logic. It also plays on the iconic image of Bond as cool and sophisticated, contrasting it with the idea of needing help with simple division.

Todays SH1T Jokes

  • A farmer buys a new young rooster when his old rooster can’t “perform” anymore.
  • “Bear with me”
  • What’s the difference between a bull and a band that plays at weddings?
  • “Are you taking any medications?”
  • Training Day At The Gas Station
  • How many fruit flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  • So, a friend told me about a horror movie where if you get a phone call and don’t answer it, you die.
  • A young reporter went to a retirement home
  • A woman calls the cops about her neighbour.
  • My wife walks out of the shower, winks at me and says, “Honey, I shaved myself down there. Do you know what that means?”
  • Due to a recent surge in mining activities, the logistical network has been overwhelmed in my area.
  • Which movie actor also knows how to code?
  • Bridget Jones is to be celebrated with a new 200kg statue in London’s Leicester Square…
  • The legend of Uncle Marvo (the master of lightning wit, backchat and repartee)
  • Just watching Alien vs Predator…
  • Did you hear about the clown that caused a blackout?
  • Ever since my girlfriend got pregnant a lot has changed in my life
  • Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs visit the Vatican for a blessing.
  • Nowadays pennies taste horrible. Back in the day they used to taste almost like toothpaste to me…
  • A radiator is essentially a vital organ to a car, so it’s kinda weird that the town in the movie Cars is called “Radiator Springs”
  • How is Michael Jackson like Caviar?
  • I made a helpful suggestion about my wife’s donation bag
  • As a person with epilepsy what do i call an Ambulance?
  • I got complimented on my parking today
  • NASA is launching a satellite to say sorry to the aliens.
  • A physicist is walking past a building…
  • A mistress is like a grenade.
  • Sorry Alliens
  • The Skinny Lumberjack
  • What’s the difference between a manly lesbian and a really short guy who works in the meat department?
  • I was thinking about having dinner at a family style restaurant by myself.
  • I made a helpful suggestion about my wife’s donation bag
  • A family goes on vacation to the beach in southern Mexico.
  • What’s a popular 60s pop duo with many Muslim?
  • A man adopts a stray dog.
  • An alcoholic read an article on the dangers of drinking alcohol and decided it was finally time to quit…
  • The wife is calling her husband at work.
  • Sue went to the cemetery every day to water the flowers on the grave of her late husband, Bob.
  • A guy’s wife comes into the room and says to her husband, “What the hell are you doing? I thought you were going to fix the sink!”
  • What do you call a photo of an old person?
  • Why are math books always so stressed?
  • Nobody came to my cocktail party
  • I just ran into a guy quoting V for Vendetta. You know, the whole “remember, remember the fifth of November,” speech. And I could help but think…
  • I just bought a 5 foot tall flightless bird for $3
  • Wife says that I’m cheap
  • I just got accused of mansplaining!
  • We were desperate to fix our son’s failing math grade.
  • A couple, both 78, went to see a therapist.
  • What did the vampires mother say when he told her he wanted to marry a werewolf?
  • Being an alcoholic is gambling with your life.

Categories

  • "Walks into a bar"
  • Bartender
  • Blonde
  • Chicken
  • Dirty
  • Doctor
  • Dog
  • Heaven
  • Husband
  • Irishman
  • Knock Knock
  • Knock-Knock Joke
  • Lawyer
  • Lightbulb
  • Long
  • Mother-in-law
  • Politician
  • Priest
  • Religion
  • Totally Feckin random
  • Walks into a bar
  • What's the difference
  • Why Did
  • Wife
©2025 Joke Poo | Design: Newspaperly WordPress Theme