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Joke Poo

The first joke I ever heard

Posted on August 11, 2025 by Joke Poo

My older brother told me this joke when I was six years old:


The King’s Dying Wish

Long ago, when ping pong balls were rare and precious, a dying king summoned his three sons.

The King was a table tennis fanatic. He said " My dying wish is for you to bring me ping pong balls."

The eldest returned a week later with a treasure chest full of them. The king was pleased.

The second returned a month later with a whole boxcar of them. The king was overjoyed.

Two years passed before the youngest staggered in, battered and worn, carrying only a bulging handkerchief.

The king opened it, recoiled, and shouted, “What are these bloody hairy things?!”

The prince bowed. “Just as you commanded, Father… King Kong’s balls.”

Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” riffing on the King Kong’s balls joke, titled accordingly:

Joke Poo: The Sultan’s Sacred Seeds

Long ago, in a desert kingdom where watermelon seeds were considered sacred and potent symbols of fertility, a dying sultan summoned his three sons.

The Sultan was a fervent believer in the watermelon’s power. He wheezed, “My final decree, my deepest desire, is for each of you to bring me watermelon seeds.”

The eldest returned a week later with a jeweled casket overflowing with glistening black seeds. The sultan nodded approvingly.

The second son arrived a month later with an entire caravan laden with sacks upon sacks of seeds, enough to plant a thousand melon patches. The sultan’s eyes widened with satisfaction.

Five years passed. The youngest son, gaunt and sun-scorched, finally crawled before the sultan, clutching a single, ragged pouch.

The sultan, barely clinging to life, reached a trembling hand and opened the pouch. He gasped, his face contorting in horror. “What in the seven hells is this?! It’s… pulverized! It’s gritty! It’s full of sand!”

The prince, near collapse, croaked, “As you commanded, Father… King Tut’s seeds.”

Alright, let’s dissect this joke and then spin off some related humor.

Joke Dissection:

  • Premise: A dying king, obsessed with ping pong, sends his sons on a quest for ping pong balls. The setting is ancient times, where ping pong balls are rare and valuable.
  • Setup: The eldest two sons deliver ping pong balls in increasing quantities, setting an expectation of extravagance and commitment to the king’s request.
  • Twist/Punchline: The youngest son misunderstands the request (or interprets it literally, in a darkly humorous way) and brings back King Kong’s testicles, playing on the phonetic similarity between “ping pong” and “King Kong.” The shock value and grotesque imagery create the humor.
  • Key Elements:
    • Phonetic Pun: “Ping Pong” vs. “King Kong”
    • Subversion of Expectation: The audience anticipates more ping pong balls, not primate anatomy.
    • Grotesque Imagery: The “bloody hairy things” are the core of the punchline’s impact.
    • Historical Setting: Ancient times provide a contrast to the absurdity of the ping pong ball obsession.

Humorous Enrichment:

Now, let’s leverage these elements to create something new:

Type of Humor: “Did You Know?” with a Twist

Concept: To amplify the ping pong angle while still echoing the “Kong” element, we’ll explore bizarre ping pong related facts, leading to a funny and absurd reveal.

The “Did You Know?”

“Did you know that the world’s largest ping pong paddle is over 11 feet long? It was created in 2017. Imagine the difficulty of controlling that massive surface! But what’s truly shocking isn’t the paddle’s size, it’s the rumored origin of the material. Some claim it’s made from treated hide, specifically… allegedly… a single, very large primate scrotum.”

Why it Works:

  • Builds on Reality: The “world’s largest ping pong paddle” is a real fact (easily verifiable). This grounds the joke in something tangible.
  • Contrast: The initial fact is relatively mundane and interesting. The escalating absurdity contrasts sharply with the first fact, mirroring the original joke’s subversion.
  • Lingering Implication: The “allegedly” keeps it just ambiguous enough to be funny without being overly explicit. It relies on the audience’s mind to connect the dots, similar to the original joke.
  • Connection to Original: The “primate scrotum” directly references the “King Kong’s balls” punchline, maintaining a thematic link.

Hopefully, this builds on the original in a fun and slightly repulsive way!

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