Skip to content
Joke Poo
Menu
  • Home
    • The Enduring Power of a Good Joke
  • Categories
    • Totally Feckin random
    • Why Did
    • Long
    • Wife
    • Walks into a bar
    • Dog
    • Bartender
    • Husband
    • Doctor
    • Chicken
  • Privacy Policy
Menu
Joke Poo

The Garden

Posted on June 5, 2025 by Joke Poo

John is in prison and he gets a letter from his father, who is getting up in years. His father says he doesn't know how he's going to prepare the garden this year without his son's help.

John knows his mail is being monitored at the prison, so he writes back to his Dad and tells him, whatever you do, don't dig up the back yard.

The next day a bunch of cops show up and dig up the whole yard, looking for the missing money, but they never find a thing.

John then writes to his Dad and tells him to go ahead and plant the garden. "It's the best I could do under the circumstances."

Joke Poo: The Internship

Title: The Internship

Sarah is interning at a shady tech startup, living on instant ramen and caffeine. She gets a desperate text from her mom, a meticulous accountant nearing retirement. Her mom says she can’t possibly balance the annual books without Sarah’s advanced spreadsheet skills.

Sarah knows all company communications are monitored. So, she texts back: "Mom, whatever you do, DO NOT touch the cloud server labeled ‘Financial Projections – v2.0 FINAL’."

The next day, the IRS barges into the startup, seizes all the company’s computers, and spends weeks auditing everything, looking for hidden offshore accounts. They find absolutely nothing.

Sarah then texts her Mom: "Okay, now you can start working on the books. It’s the best I could do with my limited access privileges."

Alright, let’s break down this joke and cultivate some new comedic blooms.

Joke Dissection:

  • Core Concept: A prisoner uses a coded message to have his father’s garden dug up by the police, knowing they won’t find anything but achieving the practical outcome of having the ground prepared for planting. It’s a play on outsmarting authority and finding loopholes.
  • Key Elements:
    • Prison: Represents confinement, limited communication, suspicion.
    • Coded Message: Relies on implication and understanding between father and son.
    • Father/Son Relationship: Implies a history of criminal activity and trust (or at least, shared understanding of illegal activity).
    • Garden: A symbol of normalcy, simple needs, and a connection to the land.
    • Money: Suggests a past crime; the buried loot is the object of the police’s fruitless search.
    • Police: Represents authority, suspicion, and predictable behavior.
    • Irony: The attempt to hide something illegal results in an entirely legal benefit.

Comedic Enrichment:

Now, let’s take these elements and craft something new:

Type of Humor: Amusing "Did You Know?" / Witty Observation

New Humor:

Did you know: Coded messages in prison aren’t always about escaping or organizing illicit activities. Sometimes, they’re about gardening. Inmates, with their limited resources and abundance of time, have developed elaborate code systems. "Tell Mom to use Miracle-Gro" might actually mean, "Bury the evidence deeper." And "Don’t forget to water the tomatoes" is code for "Meet me at the west wall, 3 AM".

Type of Humor: New Joke Variation

New Joke:

A mathematician gets thrown in jail for tax evasion. He gets a letter from his wife: "Honey, I don’t know how to solve this integral. I desperately need your help to find the area under the curve."

Knowing his mail is monitored, he writes back: "Darling, whatever you do, don’t integrate between 2 and 5. It doesn’t converge."

The next day, a team of accountants arrive and spend hours attempting the integration, trying every method they know. They leave frustrated and empty-handed.

The mathematician writes back: "Go ahead and approximate with Simpson’s Rule, or just count the squares. It’s the best I could do under the circumstances."

Explanation:

I used the same structure as the original joke (letter, coded instruction, futile authority action, secondary benefit). But replaced the elements with those of Math. Integration instead of digging and area under a curve instead of digging up money. I hope you found this funny!

Todays SH1T Jokes

  • Who puts the “P” in R-E-S-P-E-C-T?
  • The rescue team found a clue about a crashed airplane
  • “Why do you think you’d be a good waiter?”
  • I just took a great hiking class
  • Serious question
  • The Scottish definition of a gentleman…
  • I replaced my wife’s lip balm with a glue stick
  • A guy decides to go to confession for the first time in many years. He enters the confessional, and there’s a shelf with cigars, brandy, and chocolate.
  • In WW2 a General had an idea on how to cheer the troops up
  • A man goes in for a checkup and afterwards the doctor comes in and somberly tells him that his kidneys are failing.
  • World used to be better, we could have 1 steak every week, only with minimum wage
  • What works faster than a calculator?
  • A man dies and goes to hell
  • I went to see my doctor, he asked me to provide a stool sample.
  • I just tripped over a box of Kleenex. Ow!
  • Sheryl Crow and Russell Crowe walk into a bar.
  • A man was out on the golf course one sunny day when he realized he was completely lost.
  • In England, when you turn 100, you get a royal letter from the King or Queen.
  • A man dies and ends up in hell.
  • What do you get when you goose a ghost?
  • Cemetery cold night
  • What do you call a roasted doll?
  • A man walks into a pharmacy
  • A couple gets married
  • If Waldo turned into a monster which one would he turn into?
  • How do you know if a ghost has been using your bathroom?
  • Why does everyone know the Muffin Man but not the Muffin Woman?
  • A shy Italian girl gets married
  • a stoner, a jedi and emergency room surgeon walk into a bar
  • I bought a Hustler magazine and boy was I disappointed
  • What’s a debt collector’s favourite herb?
  • What’s the most negative month of the year?
  • A Man Is Invited To A Christmas Fancy Dress Party
  • You can’t trust people on Halloween anymore!
  • What did the Catholic priest say to his disciple?
  • The other day an old guy called about an Australian stick.
  • The Queen, the Pope and Nelson Mandela walk into a bar
  • Good Christians should never use euphemisms for the toilet
  • I went for a swim in France on a blowy day.
  • My masochist girlfriend said, “Choke me!”
  • Ever wondered which service has the toughest troops?
  • A doctor comes into the room, shaking his head at the clipboard in his hands, and tells the patient they’re being moved to the east wing.
  • What do you call a ghosts poop?
  • I just brought a 2nd hand book about pasta.
  • Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
  • What dance did the cheese do at the Halloween party?
  • What happens when you’re late for a bris?
  • I’m getting tired of these trick or treaters this evening….
  • Patient: “Doctor! My stool is never solid!”
  • A truck carrying several rhesus moneys overturned.

Categories

  • "Walks into a bar"
  • Bartender
  • Blonde
  • Chicken
  • Dirty
  • Doctor
  • Dog
  • Heaven
  • Husband
  • Irishman
  • Knock Knock
  • Knock-Knock Joke
  • Lawyer
  • Lightbulb
  • Long
  • Mother-in-law
  • Politician
  • Priest
  • Religion
  • Totally Feckin random
  • Walks into a bar
  • What's the difference
  • Why Did
  • Wife
©2025 Joke Poo | Design: Newspaperly WordPress Theme