Mary raises her hand, stands up, and says, "My Mom and I went to the museum, and it was fascinating."
"That's very nice, Mary," says the teacher. But you used 'fascinating.' Can anyone give me a sentence using 'fascinate?'"
Bobby raises his hand and says, "I watched my older brother dissect a frog, and I was fascinated."
"Very good, Bobby," says the teacher. But you used 'fascinated.' Can anyone give me a sentence using 'fascinate?'
Little Johnny is waving his hand like crazy, so the teacher reluctantly calls on him.
Little Johnny stands up and says, "My Aunt Carol has a sweater with ten buttons. But her tits are so big, she can only fascinate."
Joke Poo: The Accountant
The senior partner asks the junior accountants to give him a sentence using the word “depreciate.”
“David raises his hand, stands up, and says, “We depreciated the office furniture by 10% this year.”
“That’s very good, David,” says the senior partner. “But you used ‘depreciated.’ Can anyone give me a sentence using ‘depreciate’?”
Sarah raises her hand and says, “We need to depreciate the value of these assets due to market fluctuations.”
“Excellent, Sarah,” says the senior partner. “But you also used ‘depreciated.’ Can anyone give me a sentence using ‘depreciate’?”
Little Timmy is practically vibrating with excitement, waving his hand furiously, so the senior partner sighs and calls on him.
Little Timmy stands up and says, “I went to the toilet this morning, but I couldn’t quite depreciate. It was a struggle.”
Alright, let’s break down this joke and then build upon it.
Joke Dissection:
- Setup: Teacher asking for examples using “fascinate” in the active voice. This establishes a formal, academic context.
- Pattern: Two polite, grammatically correct examples (Mary, Bobby) that use the past participle “fascinated,” highlighting the teacher’s specific request for the active form. This creates a rhythm and expectation.
- Punchline: Little Johnny’s crude response, using “fascinate” in a grammatically correct but hilariously inappropriate context. The humor derives from:
- The unexpected sexualization of a seemingly innocent scenario.
- The contrast between the children’s previous answers and Little Johnny’s lewd one.
- The implication that the aunt’s breasts are so large, they can only begin to close the sweater but cannot completely fasten it.
- Key Elements:
- The word “fascinate” (both the word itself and its meaning of attracting and holding interest)
- Grammatical correctness vs. social appropriateness
- The innocence of children vs. the crudeness of Little Johnny
- Breasts, sweaters, and the act of fastening (or failing to fasten)
Comedic Enrichment:
Now, let’s use some of these elements to create a new joke, observation, or “did you know” that builds on the original:
New Joke:
Why was the tailor always losing at hide-and-seek?
Because he could never fascinate. He could only fasten, hate.
Explanation of New Joke:
This joke riffs on the sound of “fascinate” and breaks it down into “fasten, hate”. The setup about the tailor is to introduce the association with “fasten.” The punchline plays on the literal action of fastening. This creates a bit of wordplay humor.
Amusing ‘Did You Know?’
Did you know that the earliest known bras, dating back to the 15th century, weren’t designed to fascinate at all? They were actually more like corsets, designed to flatten and conceal, rather than emphasize. So, technically, Aunt Carol might have been ahead of her time… in the future! (Although, maybe invest in a bigger sweater, Aunt Carol!)
Explanation of ‘Did You Know?’
This “Did You Know?” takes the element of breasts/clothing and introduces a historical perspective. The humor comes from the contrast between the original joke’s crude focus on exaggerated breasts and the historical trend of minimizing them. It also gently pokes fun at Aunt Carol’s… overflowing generosity.
The final parenthetical adds a touch of modern sensibility, advising Aunt Carol on more practical clothing choices while still winking at the suggestive nature of the original joke.