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There was once an old man whose family couldn’t take care of him any longer.

Posted on August 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

Because of that, the family had decided that a nursing home would be the best solution for the grumpy old man. Of course he directly rejected the idea, but his family stood firm and persuaded him it was the best solution for him.

The first day at the nursing home, the grumpy old man spent most of the time laying in his bed reflecting on his life so far and started feeling very lonely. After a while, an orderly stopped by to see how the grumpy old man was doing on his first day in the home.

“How are you doing today sir?” she asked the grumpy old man, “I see this is your first day with us.” The grumpy old man replied with a nod.

In no time the two began talking up a storm. And as the conversation continued, the orderly saw that the room was filled with fresh flowers, cards and balloons from friends and family. She also noticed a bowl full of shelled peanuts standing on top of the table that was next to the bed, and she helped herself to a handful of them.

As the two continued talking with each other, the orderly kept eating more and more of the peanuts. After a while, she looked at her watch and noticed that nearly two hours had passed since she started talking with the grumpy old man. “Oh my goodness,” she said, “Time has gone by, we’ve been talkin for 2 hours. I really have to tend to other people in home, too.”

“Of course, it’s okay,” said the grumpy old man, “I feel way better now, now I have been able to talk to someone else besides myself.” After having a look at the bowl of peanuts the orderly said, “Now I really feel awful! I almost finished the whole bowl of peanuts!” Awww, that’s okay young man,” rasped the grumpy old man. “I really don’t even like peanuts,” he said.

“I just like to suck the chocolate off ’em."

Joke Poo: The Coding Convention

There once was a junior programmer whose code was so messy, the senior developers couldn’t stand to review it anymore. They decided a strict coding convention was the best solution for him. Of course, he initially rejected the idea, but the team stood firm and persuaded him it was crucial for maintainability.

The first day of adhering to the convention, the junior programmer spent most of the time meticulously formatting his code, reflecting on every semicolon and indentation level, and feeling very restricted. After a while, a senior developer stopped by to see how the junior programmer was doing.

“How’s it going with the convention, champ?” he asked. “I see this is your first day really sticking to it.” The junior programmer replied with a weary nod.

In no time, the two began discussing the finer points of proper commenting and variable naming. As the conversation continued, the senior developer noticed the screen was filled with perfectly formatted, beautifully commented code. He also noticed a large document filled with code examples sitting next to the keyboard, and he started copying it into the compiler.

As the two continued talking, the senior developer kept using more and more of the example code. After a while, he looked at his watch and noticed that nearly two hours had passed. “Oh my goodness,” he said, “Time has flown by! We’ve been talking for two hours! I really have to get back to my own work, too.”

“Of course, it’s okay,” said the junior programmer, “I feel way better now, now I know I will never get that error because you have fixed it for me.” After having a look at the document filled with examples the senior developer said, “Now I really feel awful! I almost finished the whole document of code!”

“Awww, that’s okay, my friend,” rasped the junior programmer. “I don’t even understand that code properly yet,” he said.

“I just use it to test if it compiles!”

Okay, let’s dissect this joke and then build something new.

Joke Dissection:

  • Setup: A grumpy old man is placed in a nursing home against his will and feels lonely. An orderly attempts to cheer him up.
  • Misdirection: The orderly assumes the peanuts are for her to eat. The audience likely assumes the same.
  • Punchline: The old man reveals he doesn’t like peanuts, he only sucks the chocolate off, implying he’s been offering her his discarded, sucked-on peanuts. This is unexpected and gross, creating the humor.
  • Humor Type: Irony, shock value, and a bit of awkwardness.

Key Elements:

  • Grumpy Old Man: A classic comedic trope.
  • Nursing Home: A setting often associated with aging, loneliness, and the loss of independence.
  • Peanuts (with Chocolate Coating): The seemingly innocent object that becomes the vehicle for the punchline.
  • Unexpected Revelation: The old man’s odd behavior and unexpected admission.

Factual/Interesting Tidbits (relating to peanuts and chocolate):

  • Peanut Allergies: Peanut allergies are one of the most common and severe food allergies.
  • Chocolate’s History: Chocolate was originally a bitter drink enjoyed by the Aztecs and Mayans, not the sweet treat we know today.
  • Peanut “Nuts”: Peanuts are technically legumes, not nuts!
  • Chocolate and Longevity: A study once suggested that regularly consuming small amounts of dark chocolate could be linked to increased longevity.

New Humorous Creation (a ‘Did You Know’ style observation):

“Did you know that peanuts, technically legumes, can dramatically alter their nutritional profile when passed through the mouth of a grumpy old man? A recent study showed that sucking the chocolate off a peanut can increase its levels of ‘Aged Disgust’ by up to 300%, making it a potent source of discomfort for unsuspecting nursing home orderlies. So, always ask about the ‘suck-to-shell’ ratio before accepting snacks from the elderly.”

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