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Category: Totally Feckin random

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Posted on July 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

Ground beef. Joke Poo: What do you call a cloud with no rain? Dry Humor. Alright, let’s dissect this bovine-based bon mot! Joke Analysis: Setup: “What do you call a cow with…

A joke for reddit

Posted on July 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

Some monks came down to a small village in need of carpentry. They offered to replace all the wooden pillars and support beams in all the buildings by themselves. When the villagers…

“Son, I found a condom in your room.”

Posted on July 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

“Hey, thanks, Grandpa!” “Why are you calling me Grandpa?” “Because I couldn’t find it yesterday.” Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo,” maintaining a similar structure and surprise related to the…

A man rubs a magic lamp, and a genie appears.

Posted on July 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

"You get one wish," says the genie. The man thinks and says: "I’m scared of flying and boats. I wish for a bridge from California to Hawaii so I can drive there."…

On his first day at work, an apprentice butcher was ordered to chop up some rabbit carcasses for display in the shop window.

Posted on July 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

He was able to slice through the baby rabbits without any problem but found that the blade was not strong enough to force its way through the adult animals. After struggling for…

When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue

Posted on July 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

When she was in a bad mood, it left a big red mark on my forehead. Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version of the mood ring joke: Joke Poo: The Emotional Toilet…

I wanted to be a CEO

Posted on July 20, 2025 by Joke Poo

But I ended up in an entry-level job at the saltwater taffee factory. At least it's a sea sweet position. Okay, here’s my attempt: Joke Poo: I Wanted To Be A Magician…

A tourist goes to a restaurant in Madrid and orders the special. When it comes, he asks what it is.

Posted on July 20, 2025 by Joke Poo

"These are cojones, Señor." "What's that? What are cojones?" "These are the testicles of the bull, the one which lost the bullfight this afternoon at the arena. Very good. Very good." So he…

I watched a porno flick about a sex competition, and couldn’t decide who I wanted to win.

Posted on July 20, 2025 by Joke Poo

I was pulling for all of them. Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” riff on the original, titled “Data’s Dilemma”: Joke Poo: Data’s Dilemma I was watching a computer science competition all about…

I said to my therapist “I’ve been feeling ultra paranoid lately”

Posted on July 20, 2025 by Joke Poo

He said "Well you looked perfectly relaxed in your bath this morning" Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo,” riffing on the original: Joke Poo: The Performance Review I told my boss, “I’ve been…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • A man is doing 20 over the speed limit on the highway when a cop pulls him over.
  • Accent misjudged
  • The speeding biker
  • My boss told me to have a good day…
  • Came up with this one while sitting in traffic: What’s a whiskey drinkers favorite car?
  • What do you call a cow with no legs?
  • An older couple were lying in bed one night.
  • At dinner, little Timmy was asked by his father to lead the prayer.
  • A joke I made up in third grade: How does a skunk protect himself from danger?
  • Captain Kirk. Peter Pan. Lestat De Lioncourt. Miss Marple. Don Draper. The Three Little Pigs. Robin Hood. Daffy Duck. Optimus Prime. Bilbo Baggins. Count Dracula. Han Solo. Jack and Diane. Elmo. Pikachu. Jean Valjean. Snow White.
  • A joke for reddit
  • A husband and wife were celebrating their 50th anniversary.
  • I said to the doctor “That haemorrhoid cream you prescribed for me is causing some unpleasant reactions”.
  • A woman hits a chicken as it’s crossing the road.
  • A 50yo Woman Goes in for Cancer Surgery
  • “Son, I found a condom in your room.”
  • Interviewer: “How much amount of milk does your cow produce?”. Farmer: “Which one, black one or white one?”
  • MENSA has started administering a new type of test that scans your social media posts determine your functional IQ.
  • A woman cheats on her husband
  • Hello, you have reached the Men’s Help Line, my name is Bob. How can I help you?
  • A man rubs a magic lamp, and a genie appears.
  • A Guy Meets An Actor
  • Frank and the Chili Cook off
  • On his first day at work, an apprentice butcher was ordered to chop up some rabbit carcasses for display in the shop window.
  • Why did the condom fly across the room?
  • When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue
  • “Pain” denotes the ache an Englishman feels
  • A Bishop, a Pope and Mother Superior are standing at the gates of Heaven.
  • I wanted to be a CEO
  • I was asked (in front of my girlfriend) what I would have done in the position of the CEO at the Coldplay concert. I said I’d never be in that situation!
  • On the news today it said they’ve unearthed a sarcophagus in Egypt filled with chocolate and nuts
  • So a guy comes home extremely pissed off. “What’s the matter, honey?” asks his wife.
  • Three very different couples want to get married at the same church!
  • A couple of guys are at the bar. The first guy says to his buddy, “My wife just admitted to me that she’s been having an affair with Bob the mailman.”
  • A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years.
  • 3 nuns are standing at the gates of heaven, St Peter says they’ll be allowed in if they can each answer a single question
  • My BDSM society took me to court for not being hardcore enough.
  • A tourist goes to a restaurant in Madrid and orders the special. When it comes, he asks what it is.
  • What do orgasms and sneezing have in common?
  • A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced five husbands.
  • It’s early fall, Joe is out raking leaves…
  • I said to my wife, “Sit down, I’ve got something to tell you.”
  • A British Police Officer Is Walking Along Side an American Officer When They Spot An 18-Year-Old Casually Resting on Heavy Duty Sniper Rifle, Sipping A Beer in the Front Yard.
  • A cowboy rode into town and decided to stop by the local saloon for a drink.
  • I watched a porno flick about a sex competition, and couldn’t decide who I wanted to win.
  • What is the difference between a snowman and a snow woman?
  • I said to my therapist “I’ve been feeling ultra paranoid lately”
  • The Butcher Dance
  • Dear Tech Support, Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0
  • A teacher and his engineering students were given free plane tickets to go on a field trip.

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