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Category: Totally Feckin random

Tried to go fishing with Tom Cruise the other day, but the lake was closed…..

Posted on August 27, 2025 by Joke Poo

fishin' impossible… Okay, here’s the “Joke Poo” version, riffing on the original: Joke Poo: Accounting Impossible Tried to do my taxes with John Travolta the other day, but my return got rejected……

I recently returned from a vacation in Australia, it’s nothing like what they say on the internet

Posted on August 27, 2025 by Joke Poo

There are absolutely no kangaroos, no beaches, they misspelled their own country's name on the signs and for some strange reason everyone spoke German. Edit Context: many years ago I read a…

Am I fat?

Posted on August 27, 2025 by Joke Poo

• Boomers: “You could stand to lose a few pounds” • Millennials: “You’re beautiful just the way you are!” • Gen Z: “Don’t body shame me!” • Gen X: “I know 5…

Small acts of kindness can make someone’s day

Posted on August 27, 2025 by Joke Poo

I met a woman outside the mall crying, she had lost $200, so I gave her $40 from the $200 I found. When God blesses you, remember to bless others. Okay, here’s…

What do you call someone who raps about vegetables?

Posted on August 27, 2025 by Joke Poo

A beetboxer! Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on your veggie-rapping pun: Joke Poo: What do you call a bathroom stall reserved solely for comedians? A wit-loo! Alright, let’s…

Arnie the flasher was going to retire next month…

Posted on August 27, 2025 by Joke Poo

But he changed his mind. He decided to stick it out another year. Joke Poo: Title: Brenda the Baker was planning on closing up shop next week… But then she saw her…

My girlfriend and I are trying this whole “long distance relationship” thing.

Posted on August 27, 2025 by Joke Poo

I have to stay 100 feet away from her at all times. Also, the police say I should stop referring to her as my girlfriend. Okay, here’s my attempt: Joke Poo: My…

Three guys stranded on a deserted island find a magical genie in a bottle

Posted on August 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

The genie offers to grant them each one wish for setting him free. First guy wishes he was off the island and back home. Poof, he disappears and is instantly back at…

A man goes up to a newspaper stand, buys a copy of the New York Times, takes one look at the front page, and throws it away with a disappointed look on his face.

Posted on August 25, 2025 by Joke Poo

Every day, he comes back to the newspaper stand, buys a copy of the Times, looks over the front page, gets disappointed, and then throws the paper away without opening it. This…

The Mother’s Instinct

Posted on August 25, 2025 by Joke Poo

After years of searching, a young man finally found love. He decided to introduce the woman of his dreams to his adoring mother by playing a trick: He brought home three women…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • The burley gates of heaven
  • Did you hear about the price of chimneys these days?!
  • The Captain’s Red Shirt
  • Little Johnny’s neighbor
  • Horse
  • Your momma’s so fat…
  • I saw a dwarf climbing down a rope from a prison rooftop.
  • A Jewish woman came to her rabi, visibly upset.
  • Teacher asks Billy a math question
  • I find people can be so judgemental these days….
  • The butcher shop
  • September is Alzheimer’s awareness month
  • I saw a bison in the gym doing a workout the other day….
  • A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt.
  • Mexican Mayonnaise
  • I hate charging my electric car.
  • One day I called home and my kid answered. I asked where’s mom?
  • An old man comes to confession and says to the priest:
  • A Knock Knock Joke
  • What’s common between a testicular joke and testicular cancer?
  • A guy walks in a store looking to buy some beer
  • One afternoon, a teenage couple was on a hike in the woods.
  • Wish me luck, everyone! I have to meet with some people working at my bank in a few minutes. If all goes well I’ll pay off every debt I have, and still have enough to retire early.
  • A penguin was driving through a small town when his car broke down…
  • Not all construction tasks are equally enjoyable.
  • In a carpenter’s workshop, one apprentice makes a bet that he can recognize any type of wood just by its smell. They blindfold him and hand him the first board… the apprentice smells it confidently and says: “Oak!”
  • I was admitted into the hospital and as I settled into my bed, I overheard my “roommate” using the speakerphone to order breakfast from the cafeteria
  • My mom went on vacation to Florida
  • School year is like pregnancy.
  • A man visits his lawyer
  • A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer.
  • Election results are like group project grades
  • A librarian is having a discussion with a cobra…
  • Job interview question: Why ask for a high salary with no experience?
  • The other day I needed to pay a visit to a public toilet
  • A man doesn’t come home from work Friday, instead he spends the whole weekend out fishing with his buddies.
  • A hunter walks into a pub and says that he is the greatest hunter, he can recognize any game animal by its fur, and if they show him the wound, he can even tell which weapon killed it in exchange for a drink.
  • Guy : Doctor, my Girlfriend is pregnant but we always use protection and the rubber never broke. How is it possible?
  • (An original joke best read aloud) My friend got a job as one of those sushi girls. Y’know, where guys eat sushi off her naked.
  • What did the ghost of the Redditor say when looking at it’s own corpse?
  • What’s yellow and really hurts if it gets in your eye?
  • What a nice couple, how long have you been married?
  • Three cougars
  • Why did the BYU student come inside?
  • Reminder: terrorist jokes are tasteless and unfunny
  • Would make a joke about fencing
  • Possums are from the south
  • Did you know they just ruled dad jokes to be unconstitutional?
  • Boudreaux goes to the doctor
  • I called off work today when I saw the date

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