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Category: Totally Feckin random

What’s the worst way to find out you’re unattractive?

Posted on August 10, 2025 by Joke Poo

When the guy in the van is suddenly “all out” of free candy. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” version: Joke Poo: The Recycling Revelation What’s the worst way to…

My girlfriend insisted that I tell her my complete ssexual history.

Posted on August 10, 2025 by Joke Poo

So I told her about my first time and listed all the women I slept with, up to her… And that is where I should have stopped. Okay, here’s my attempt at…

They say if you want to truly know somebody you got to walk a mile in their shoes

Posted on August 10, 2025 by Joke Poo

But I think that’s going just a bit too far Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo,” titled “Joke Logs”: Original Joke: They say if you want to truly know somebody…

My boss said something to me the other day that made it impossible for me to go on working for him.

Posted on August 10, 2025 by Joke Poo

"You're fired." Okay, here’s my attempt: Joke Poo: Bird Droppings My ornithologist friend said something to me the other day during our birdwatching trip that made it impossible for me to keep…

Santa comes

Posted on August 10, 2025 by Joke Poo

Two prostitutes are chatting after a long day. One says, “You know, Christmas is coming soon! I’m really looking forward to it.” The other smiles, “Yeah, me too, especially the presents! So……

My High School was so outdated…

Posted on August 10, 2025 by Joke Poo

The periodic table still had “wind” on it. Okay, here’s the joke: Joke Poo: My Son’s Diaper Was So Ancient… …when I opened it, the poop had already fossilized and was being…

A recruit is in the army. On the first day, the commander says:

Posted on August 9, 2025 by Joke Poo

My name is Sergeant Burtt. Remember — Burtt, there’s an R in the middle. If anyone says it wrong or makes fun of it, will be in big trouble. From time to…

So somebody asked me to tell them a joke they’d never heard before and will likely never hear again. So I told them a joke…

Posted on August 9, 2025 by Joke Poo

in sign language. Okay, here’s my attempt: Joke Poo: The Culinary Complaint So, a customer called the restaurant manager over and said, “I need to make a complaint you’ll never hear before…

If I ever start drinking again,

Posted on August 9, 2025 by Joke Poo

I am going to convert to Judaism. You never see a Star of David memorial on the side of the road. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on your…

Insect

Posted on August 9, 2025 by Joke Poo

A family is driving through a sketchy neighborhood when suddenly a huge dildo lands on their windshield… and after a few seconds, slides off. From the back seat, their kid asks: “What…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • Cross-eyed horse
  • The woman and her blonde friend decided to take a fishing trip.
  • A wife, pissed off that her husband was late again, wrote a dramatic note: I’ve had enough. I’m leaving you. Don’t try to find me.
  • A man calls the police
  • What is a landlord’s favorite kind of tea?
  • Fun puns.
  • My wife and I were discussing names for our newborn son when she asked if we could name him after her father.
  • What do you call a group of crows that are one short of a flock?
  • Sister Mary sat across the table from the mother superior.
  • Max and Pete are getting a haircut and shave at a barbershop.
  • An elderly Jewish man crashes his car into a tree. The paramedics arrive and use the jaws of life to extract him from the vehicle. They then put him on a stretcher, loosen his clothing to facilitate breathing, and cover him with a blanket.
  • “Push harder”, I shouted at my wife while she was in labor.
  • Two Irishmen were sitting at a pub having a pint, watching the brothel across the street.
  • After landing my new job as a Walmart greeter — a great gig for many retirees — I lasted less than a day.
  • How can you tell it isn’t Halloween yet?
  • I was chilling on the couch before work
  • One Hot Summer Day…
  • Another man goes to another doctor
  • Purple is my favorite color…
  • The punchline is the name of the site you are on.
  • Why do ghosts like to take the elevator?
  • A man goes to the doctor
  • Camel Brand Cigarettes
  • Do you ever wake up, kiss the person sleeping beside you and feel happy that you are alive?
  • A blonde goes ice fishing
  • A 60 Year billionaire marries a hot 25 Years old girl
  • A sheepdog returns to his farmer and says, “All right, I’ve got your 70 sheep back in the east pen.”
  • The Robot Interview
  • A man goes to a doctor
  • I shot someone with a starting gun the other day.
  • A new Navy recruit starts his first day on a submarine.
  • A married man spots a gorgeous woman in the supermarket and says, “Excuse me, I’ve lost my wife somewhere in these aisles… would you mind chatting with me for a bit?”
  • A young man walks into a pharmacy and asks for condoms…
  • An old lady goes to the doctor and says ‘doc, I can’t stop farting. They’re silent with no smell, but I’ve let out 20 in the past 5 minutes sitting here’
  • Girlfriend asked if she was fat so I proved my love in the most literal way
  • A blonde is overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet
  • What’s the scariest thing a gun toting, pegging enthusiast, broke ass girlfriend can say to you?
  • Yo mama’s so fat… whenever she went to the circus…
  • What’s the difference between a guy at a gay bar, a Type 2 diabetic, and a job applicant at a construction site?
  • Patient goes to doctor for test results.
  • A farmer was selling apple seeds that were supposed to make you smarter.
  • A man walks into a bar and orders a whiskey. He takes it outside to enjoy on the bench.
  • Two old friends run into each other on the street.
  • The burley gates of heaven
  • Did you hear about the price of chimneys these days?!
  • The Captain’s Red Shirt
  • Little Johnny’s neighbor
  • Horse
  • Your momma’s so fat…
  • I saw a dwarf climbing down a rope from a prison rooftop.

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