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Category: Totally Feckin random

A man goes to a talent show with a microphone in his hand..

Posted on September 8, 2025 by Joke Poo

He salutes the judges and the crowd, Judges welcome him and ask him what is his talent and what is he going to perform. He speaks: -I am a rappe- -No i…

I brought an ice pick on a date.

Posted on September 8, 2025 by Joke Poo

The woman asked, "What's that for?" I said, "It's just for breaking the ice." Joke Poo: I Brought a Mute to the Concert I brought a trombone mute to a heavy metal…

Aliens arrive. Their first message to the world

Posted on September 8, 2025 by Joke Poo

"Release The Epstein Files" Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on the provided joke: Joke Poo: Deep Sea Demands Deep sea creatures breach the surface. Their first communication to…

A teacher is having a nightmare year with a student

Posted on September 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

On a particularly bad day she take Johnny aside to talk to him. Teacher: Johnny, do you have parents at home? Johnny: Yes. Teacher: And do you listen to them? Johnny: No….

It’s a running gag in “Calvin and Hobbes” that Calvin’s bike tries to cripple him every time he gets on it, and Calvin tries to destroy it whenever Dad isn’t watching.

Posted on September 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

It's a vicious cycle! Okay, here’s a “Joke Poo” riffing on the Calvin and Hobbes bike joke: Joke Poo: The Sentient Smart Fridge It’s a running gag in the Miller family that…

At a college football game, I pointed to the field and told the person next to me, “That’s my son down there!” She asked what number he was.

Posted on September 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

I said, “He’s our third!” Joke Poo: Digital Download At a comic convention, I pointed to the line for the exclusive print and told the person next to me, “That’s my novel…

What should be used to keep men away?

Posted on September 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

Detergent Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on the detergent joke: Joke Poo: What Should You Use To Keep Flies Away? … Deter-gents! (Like, be gents, or the flies…

A florist named Daniel got married to a short graphic designer named Stephanie.

Posted on September 6, 2025 by Joke Poo

She decided to design a new sign for his flower shop, but he thought one of the leaves on the flower in the center was too big. That's one small Steph for…

Fear not the man who has watched 10,000 movies once.

Posted on September 6, 2025 by Joke Poo

Fear the man who has watched one movie 10,000 times. Because like wtf is wrong with that guy. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” riffing on the original: Joke Poo:…

My girlfriend asked me, what would I do to her if she was a blow up doll

Posted on September 6, 2025 by Joke Poo

Apparently, letting some of the air out wasn't the correct answer. Original Joke: My girlfriend asked me, what would I do to her if she was a blow up doll? Apparently, letting…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • School year is like pregnancy.
  • A man visits his lawyer
  • A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer.
  • Election results are like group project grades
  • A librarian is having a discussion with a cobra…
  • Job interview question: Why ask for a high salary with no experience?
  • The other day I needed to pay a visit to a public toilet
  • A man doesn’t come home from work Friday, instead he spends the whole weekend out fishing with his buddies.
  • A hunter walks into a pub and says that he is the greatest hunter, he can recognize any game animal by its fur, and if they show him the wound, he can even tell which weapon killed it in exchange for a drink.
  • Guy : Doctor, my Girlfriend is pregnant but we always use protection and the rubber never broke. How is it possible?
  • (An original joke best read aloud) My friend got a job as one of those sushi girls. Y’know, where guys eat sushi off her naked.
  • What did the ghost of the Redditor say when looking at it’s own corpse?
  • What’s yellow and really hurts if it gets in your eye?
  • What a nice couple, how long have you been married?
  • Three cougars
  • Why did the BYU student come inside?
  • Reminder: terrorist jokes are tasteless and unfunny
  • Would make a joke about fencing
  • Possums are from the south
  • Did you know they just ruled dad jokes to be unconstitutional?
  • Boudreaux goes to the doctor
  • I called off work today when I saw the date
  • I hate people who take drugs
  • A very pregnant lady boarded a bus and noticed a young man smiling at her.
  • A gynecologist noticed his new patient was a little nervous.
  • The only two white actors in Black Panther are Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins, and Andy Serkis who played Gollum.
  • San Francisco, 1895. A man on the outskirts of town hires a cab driver to ride to the train station. No one wants to go that far, but one driver agrees.
  • A wife leaned into her husband and purred, “Have you ever seen twenty dollars all crumpled up?”
  • I promised my son…
  • Jogger sees fire
  • A salesman, Computer engineer and a system programmer
  • General Secretary Khrushchev and President Nixon met and started boasting about the greatness of their countries.
  • An American walks into a bar & orders a beer
  • A farmer’s son joins reddit and finds the r/Jokes subreddit
  • My Wife Always Gives 100% Sound Advice
  • A Caveman and a bear walk into a bar
  • I wrote a song about being naked.
  • Girlfriend needs a seat!
  • I’m So Old…
  • I’m surprised there’s not a lawn company called Paradise City…
  • A careless captain let his ship go adrift, and it crashed into the harbor.
  • I’m not saying that modern life has ruined our kids……
  • A plane is flying to Toronto when a blonde in economy moves up and sits in first class.
  • A high-powered attorney ended up in the hospital for a few days – and let’s just say, he was not the ideal patient.
  • The Cowboy and the Horse Thieves
  • What is a mob boss’ favorite element from the periodic table?
  • Three men are stranded on a desert island
  • My friend wrote a murder mystery set in the TARDIS…
  • U.S. Open
  • Breaking News: The founder of /r/jokes is pregnant

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