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Category: Totally Feckin random

Today I found out that I’m destined to be a lousy parent.

Posted on May 30, 2025 by Joke Poo

Social services came and took my inner child. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" inspired by your original joke: Joke Poo: Data Dump Today I discovered I’m destined to be…

Baby roach: what happens if they use raid

Posted on May 30, 2025 by Joke Poo

Papa roach: suffocation, no breathing Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo," playing on the original Roach joke: Joke Poo: Seedling Panic Baby sprout: What happens if they use Roundup? Mama…

What does the President do when he is hungry?

Posted on May 30, 2025 by Joke Poo

He rings his Taco Bell. Joke Poo: What does a toddler do when their diaper is full? They ring their doo-doo bell. Alright, let’s analyze this presidential Taco Bell gag. Joke Dissection:…

Big panties: In my day, underwear covered a person’s nethers properly and didn’t disappear between their buttocks like a string of dental floss.

Posted on May 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

Thong: ok bloomers Okay, here’s a joke, titled "Joke Poo," that riffs on the "Big Panties" joke: Joke Poo: High-Waisted Jeans Low-rise jeans: In my day, jeans sat on your hips and…

My girlfriend said I was a god in bed.

Posted on May 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

Because “I'm rarely there, and when I show up, it's usually a disappointment.” Okay, here’s my "Joke Poo" riff on your joke, titled appropriately: Joke Poo: The Intern’s Review My boss told…

I recently met a French woman called Jenna Sequar

Posted on May 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

I dunno… just had a certain something about her. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on your French woman joke, aiming for a similar structure and twist: Joke Poo:…

At an international conference

Posted on May 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

At an international conference, a Spanish man and a Swedish lady are staying in hotel rooms next to each other. Around eleven at night the man knocks on her door with a…

I can count the number of times I’ve been to Chernobyl on one hand.

Posted on May 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

7 times. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" version: Joke Poo: Octo-Bathroom I can count the number of arms I use to hold all my bathroom toiletries on one hand….

What happens to an illegally parked frog?

Posted on May 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

It gets toad away. Joke Poo: What happens to a chronically indecisive loaf of bread? It never gets buttered, always yeasting for a decision. Alright, let’s dissect this amphibious parking violation! Joke…

Have you heard about the nudist community on YouTube?

Posted on May 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

They avoid shorts Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on the nudist YouTube community joke, titled "Joke Poo": Joke Poo: Have you heard about the vegetarian vampire community’s YouTube…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • What is a wok?
  • Racism exists in the oceanographic community.
  • Why are you right handed?
  • How does Lightning McQueen masturbate?
  • I recently found out they don’t have the real Mona Lisa in the Louvre
  • I saw a woman wearing short shorts that had a NASCAR logo.
  • A redneck had just been served in a Las Vegas cocktail lounge
  • An engineer wakes up in hell and thinks to himself. I’ve been a good person. I shouldn’t be here.
  • Two teenage church-goers get married.
  • As I walked into work this morning my colleague said, “Dave, you look like shit.”
  • A guy picks up a woman at a bar. After a couple of drinks they go to his place…
  • My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic..
  • The boss was confused when one of his most reliable employees didn’t show up for work.
  • A man is doing 20 over the speed limit on the highway when a cop pulls him over.
  • Accent misjudged
  • The speeding biker
  • My boss told me to have a good day…
  • Came up with this one while sitting in traffic: What’s a whiskey drinkers favorite car?
  • What do you call a cow with no legs?
  • An older couple were lying in bed one night.
  • At dinner, little Timmy was asked by his father to lead the prayer.
  • A joke I made up in third grade: How does a skunk protect himself from danger?
  • Captain Kirk. Peter Pan. Lestat De Lioncourt. Miss Marple. Don Draper. The Three Little Pigs. Robin Hood. Daffy Duck. Optimus Prime. Bilbo Baggins. Count Dracula. Han Solo. Jack and Diane. Elmo. Pikachu. Jean Valjean. Snow White.
  • A joke for reddit
  • A husband and wife were celebrating their 50th anniversary.
  • I said to the doctor “That haemorrhoid cream you prescribed for me is causing some unpleasant reactions”.
  • A woman hits a chicken as it’s crossing the road.
  • A 50yo Woman Goes in for Cancer Surgery
  • “Son, I found a condom in your room.”
  • Interviewer: “How much amount of milk does your cow produce?”. Farmer: “Which one, black one or white one?”
  • MENSA has started administering a new type of test that scans your social media posts determine your functional IQ.
  • A woman cheats on her husband
  • Hello, you have reached the Men’s Help Line, my name is Bob. How can I help you?
  • A man rubs a magic lamp, and a genie appears.
  • A Guy Meets An Actor
  • Frank and the Chili Cook off
  • On his first day at work, an apprentice butcher was ordered to chop up some rabbit carcasses for display in the shop window.
  • Why did the condom fly across the room?
  • When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue
  • “Pain” denotes the ache an Englishman feels
  • A Bishop, a Pope and Mother Superior are standing at the gates of Heaven.
  • I wanted to be a CEO
  • I was asked (in front of my girlfriend) what I would have done in the position of the CEO at the Coldplay concert. I said I’d never be in that situation!
  • On the news today it said they’ve unearthed a sarcophagus in Egypt filled with chocolate and nuts
  • So a guy comes home extremely pissed off. “What’s the matter, honey?” asks his wife.
  • Three very different couples want to get married at the same church!
  • A couple of guys are at the bar. The first guy says to his buddy, “My wife just admitted to me that she’s been having an affair with Bob the mailman.”
  • A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years.
  • 3 nuns are standing at the gates of heaven, St Peter says they’ll be allowed in if they can each answer a single question
  • My BDSM society took me to court for not being hardcore enough.

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