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Category: Totally Feckin random

A woman on a bus is suddenly overcome with the urge to break wind. She tries to let go a squeaker but instead lets loose a loud, disgusting blast.

Posted on July 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

The entire bus goes silent, and the embarrassed woman desperately tries to think of something to say to the man sitting next to her. "Um … do you have a transfer ticket?"…

How do you fit a kayak into a glove compartment?

Posted on July 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

Make it cap size Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version of the original riddle: Joke Poo: How do you fit a flock of sheep into a clown car? Make it ewe-turn! Okay,…

A woman in a supermarket hurries to the express line with a few items.

Posted on July 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

The cashier has his back turned to her so the woman says, "Excuse me. I'm in a hurry. Could you please check me out?" The cashier turns, looks her up and down,…

What’s a kidnapper’s favorite shoes?

Posted on July 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

White Vans. Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” based on your provided joke: Joke Poo: The Plumber’s Choice What’s a plumber’s favorite breakfast cereal? …Poo-ty Pebbles! Alright, let’s dissect this joke! Original Joke…

I asked the IT guy, “How do you make a motherboard?”

Posted on July 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

I asked the IT guy, “How do you make a motherboard?” He said, “I tell her about my job.” Joke Poo: The Composting Conundrum I asked the farmer, “How do you make…

A lot of people are upset about Superman being an illegal alien, wait until they realise he’s…

Posted on July 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

Solar powered. Joke Poo: A lot of people are upset about the new plant-based burger at Burger King. Wait until they realize it’s… …grown in a lab. Alright, let’s analyze this joke…

How do New Zealanders find sheep in tall grass.

Posted on July 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

Irresistible Okay, here’s a “Joke Poo” version of the original joke: Joke Poo: Title: How do Compost Enthusiasts Find Worms? How do compost enthusiasts find worms in a well-turned pile of decaying…

A 104-year-old man is being interviewed on the news.

Posted on July 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

The interviewer says, "You're 104 years old, you walk a mile a day, your mind is still sharp, and you still take care of yourself in your own home. Tell me ……

A demon runs a factory in Hell, and has a bunch of underlings working for it.

Posted on July 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

One day, one of those employees meets someone that works at another factory, and realizes they're getting paid more souls. So, the employees talk amongst themselves, and decide to go on strike….

What the rudest elf that works for Santa?

Posted on July 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

The go F@#% urs elf. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on that… Joke Poo: What’s the grumpiest cloud in the sky? !The “Cloud No Fun”!< Okay, let’s break…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • I was at a con the other day and a girl cosplaying as Pomni held the door open for me.
  • What do you call footwear made from bananas?
  • New deodorant
  • Man sends widow email by mistake
  • My wife asked how my doctor’s visit went. I said, “Pretty normal, except he told me I need to start wearing adult diapers.” She asked why.
  • The wife came back from buying her costume for a fancy dress party earlier.
  • Gator Show
  • Last night I dreamt I had one hand on the steering wheel of my car and with the other hand I was flipping pancakes
  • There was a little sapling out in the woods between an Oak and a Maple.
  • A guy who lives in Boston hears there’s huge carp in the pond on the Common.
  • God said to Moses, “come forth, and receive eternal peace”…
  • An accountant, a lawyer, and a preacher were out hunting
  • If you’re American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you’re in the bathroom? European.
  • Eighty-year-old Bessie storms into the rec room at the retirement home, fist raised high.
  • Guy walks into a nice Italian restaurant after the lunch rush with his emotional support alligator
  • At the World Cup final, a man notices an empty seat next to him. He asks, “Who would miss the World Cup final?”
  • A guy tells his buddy, “My wife ran off with my best friend Mike yesterday.”
  • Still my favorite joke I ever made up. :)
  • We were enjoying warm drinks at the fall festival when my girlfriend’s dad pulled me aside and sternly asked what my intentions were with his daughter.
  • Did you hear about the Vulcan that got married and had children?
  • The farmer and the milking machine!
  • When two tampons walk down the street why don’t they say anything to each other?
  • A mom is putting her little boy to bed.
  • My favourite math joke
  • Little Johnny is playing in the yard when he gets a wood splinter in his hand…
  • A woman waits anxiously outside the ICU for news about her husband.
  • Three blokes were at the pub discussing what the fastest thing in the world is
  • An American politician once visited the USSR, and was given a tour of a Soviet automobile factory
  • A young Jewish man walks into an antique shop.
  • What do you call a line up at a Vietnamese restaurant?
  • Just had to take my 2 year old cousin’s shitty nappy off
  • We are the Dyslexic Borg.
  • The Girl with the Wooden Eye
  • Raised in a Barn
  • Eucalyptus
  • I was visiting my girlfriend the other night…
  • Cross-eyed horse
  • The woman and her blonde friend decided to take a fishing trip.
  • A wife, pissed off that her husband was late again, wrote a dramatic note: I’ve had enough. I’m leaving you. Don’t try to find me.
  • A man calls the police
  • What is a landlord’s favorite kind of tea?
  • Fun puns.
  • My wife and I were discussing names for our newborn son when she asked if we could name him after her father.
  • What do you call a group of crows that are one short of a flock?
  • Sister Mary sat across the table from the mother superior.
  • Max and Pete are getting a haircut and shave at a barbershop.
  • An elderly Jewish man crashes his car into a tree. The paramedics arrive and use the jaws of life to extract him from the vehicle. They then put him on a stretcher, loosen his clothing to facilitate breathing, and cover him with a blanket.
  • “Push harder”, I shouted at my wife while she was in labor.
  • Two Irishmen were sitting at a pub having a pint, watching the brothel across the street.
  • After landing my new job as a Walmart greeter — a great gig for many retirees — I lasted less than a day.

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