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Two men are sailing around the world, doing a ton of drugs, when a violent squall hits out of nowhere. In the chaos, they accidentally blow a seal in the engine and drift onto a deserted island.

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

They both survive, and the next day set out to explore the island. They see some seagulls, seals, coconuts, and also, rare psychoactive berries!

Being who they are, they both eat a handful.

Soon, they're high as balls, when they both hear singing. They jump up and rush toward the sound, thinking it's rescue, only to find a big busty mermaid coaxing them over to their boat!

Overcome by lust, they both end up having sex with the mermaid before passing out on the shore.

When they wake up, a coast guardsman is standing over them, glaring at them. He asks them, "What the hell happened here?"

"Well," says one man, "We washed ashore in a storm!"

The other, ashamed, adds, "And we did a bunch of drugs and blew a seal on our boat."

Pausing, the guardsman frowns and says, "You fucked it too."

Joke Poo: The Interview

Two programmers, infamous for their aggressive debugging techniques (i.e. copious amounts of caffeine and sleep deprivation), are interviewing for their dream jobs at a cutting-edge AI company. Due to a glitch in the system, they accidentally ingest an experimental cognitive enhancer.

They both survive the technical interview, and the next day are invited back for personality assessments. They encounter standard HR fare: personality tests, team-building exercises, and also, curiously, a table piled high with brain-shaped gummies.

Being who they are, they both wolf down a handful.

Soon, their cognitive functions are firing on all cylinders, when they both hear a melodic voice. They jump up and rush toward the sound, thinking it’s the CEO offering them the jobs, only to find a hyper-realistic android beckoning them into a virtual reality simulation!

Overcome by the siren call of perfect code generation, they both spend hours immersed in the simulation, creating flawless algorithms before collapsing, mentally exhausted, back in the HR office.

When they wake up, the head of HR is standing over them, glaring at them. She asks them, "What the hell happened here?"

"Well," says one programmer, "We aced the technical interview!"

The other, feeling a pang of guilt, adds, "And we did a bunch of cognitive enhancers and blew our minds."

Pausing, the HR head frowns and says, "You optimized it too."

Okay, let’s break down this joke:

Joke Dissection:

  • Premise: Two drug-addled sailors get shipwrecked on a deserted island with psychoactive berries and a horny mermaid.
  • Key Elements:
    • Drugs: Essential to the absurdity and bad decisions.
    • Shipwreck/Deserted Island: Creates isolation and desperation, amplifying the effects of the drugs.
    • Mermaid: The fantastical element that turns the story bizarre.
    • "Blowing a Seal": Works on two levels: engine malfunction and bestiality, the double entendre being the core punchline.
    • Coast Guard: The figure of authority bringing them back to reality.
    • Ashamed confession: "we did a bunch of drugs and blew a seal on our boat" is the set up for the punchline.
  • Punchline: The coast guard’s deadpan "You fucked it too" exposes the truth and highlights the literal meaning of "blowing a seal". The humour comes from the guard’s bluntness and the understated surprise.

Comedic Enrichment – A New Joke Structure (Playing on the Double Entendre of "Seal"):

Why did the marine engineer get fired from the traveling circus?

He kept claiming the seals were "blown" when they only missed a ball.

The manager finally said, "Look, I know you used to work on engines, but around here, if it’s got whiskers and barks, it’s not a combustion problem!"

Explanation of Enrichment:

  • Theme: Plays directly on the dual meaning of "blown seal".
  • Setting: A circus adds to the absurdity.
  • Humor: Derives from the engineer’s (misguided) technical jargon applied to animal performance, creating a disconnect that’s humorous. It’s essentially the same joke, but with the setup and punchline reversed/reconfigured. Instead of a slow-burn confession, it’s a rapid-fire misunderstanding. It’s also less crude than the original, making it potentially more palatable for a broader audience.

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