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We are the Dyslexic Borg.

Posted on September 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

Your ass will be laminated. Your sister is futile.

Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” version of the Dyslexic Borg joke, titled as requested:

Joke Poo

Title: The Anagrammatic Plumbers

We are the Anagrammatic Plumbers.

Your pipes will be rejiggered. Your water bill is ineffectual.

Alright, let’s get to work on this Dyslexic Borg joke!

Joke Dissection:

  • Premise: The joke hinges on a play on the classic Star Trek Borg catchphrase, “Resistance is futile.” It replaces “Resistance” with “Sister” due to the homophonic similarity. The threat “Resistance is futile” becomes absurd by using “Your sister is futile”.
  • Key Element 1: Dyslexia: The punchline relies on the common misconception of dyslexia manifesting primarily as letter reversals and word transpositions. It’s a simplification, but that’s what makes the joke accessible.
  • Key Element 2: The Borg: The Borg are a relentless, cybernetic collective from Star Trek known for assimilating entire species. Their lack of individuality and cold efficiency make them a frightening antagonist.
  • Key Element 3: “Resistance is Futile”: This is their iconic, terrifying declaration. It represents their unstoppable force.
  • Key Element 4: Lamination: Lamination, is a common way for Dyslexics to protect their papers.

Comedic Enrichment: New Joke & “Did You Know”

New Joke:

Why did the Dyslexic Borg decide to open a sandwich shop?

Because they kept hearing everyone say “Resistance is food tile!” They figured they’d capitalize on the demand, one laminated menu at a time. And you know what they say: “Your deli is so good, it’s truly futile…to resist!”

“Did You Know” (Amusingly relevant to the original joke):

Did you know that the Borg’s technology is so advanced that a dyslexic Borg Queen would probably just rewrite the universal grammar to make “sister” actually mean “resistance”? Assimilation isn’t just about technology; it’s about linguistic dominance! And perhaps, providing helpful laminated study guides to the newly assimilated to ease the transition.

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