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What did the English gentleman say when he found his wife in bed having a threesome?

Posted on August 8, 2025 by Joke Poo

Hello Hello Hello

Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on the original:

Title: Programmer Poo

A frazzled programmer walks into his office cubicle late one night and sees his computer doing something really weird. He leans closer, bewildered. His computer seems to be talking to two other monitors, flashing code across all three screens.

Confused, he mutters:

“Hello World! Hello World! Hello World!”

Alright, let’s analyze this joke.

Elements of the Original Joke:

  • Target: The English gentleman
  • Humor Trigger: Unexpected situation, the polite/understated reaction incongruous with the shocking scene.
  • Mechanism: Juxtaposition (shocking infidelity vs. mild, almost bored, greeting).
  • Punchline: “Hello, Hello, Hello.” – Mimicking the police response, suggesting perhaps an expectation, or just incredible British stoicism.

Why it’s funny: The humor derives from the extreme understatement of the reaction. Finding your wife in a threesome is, by most standards, a highly charged situation. The gentleman’s response is so calm and controlled that it’s absurd. The repetition of “Hello” (mimicking police procedure) adds to the absurdity, further distancing him from a normal emotional response.

Now, let’s use some facts and interesting tidbits to create a new joke/observation/tidbit.

Interesting Factoid: Historically, the “Hello” greeting was popularized by Alexander Graham Bell when he invented the telephone. He wanted people to answer by saying “Ahoy!” but “Hello” stuck, possibly because it was easier to say and sounded more polite.

New Joke/Observation:

Option 1: A Self-Awareness Joke

“I tried to invent a better greeting than ‘Hello’,” said the emotionally constipated English inventor. “But everything else felt too… ahoy-ish.”

Why it works: It combines the joke’s subject matter with the factual tidbit about Alexander Graham Bell. The self-deprecation and the reference to emotional constraint is a nod to the original joke’s stoicism.

Option 2: A “Did You Know?” Fact-Enhanced Joke

Did you know? The British stiff upper lip isn’t just a stereotype. Studies show that Brits are statistically more likely to say “Hello” in a crisis than “Oh, dear God!”

A survey recently asked how they’d react to finding their spouse in a compromising position. The most common answer? “Hello… and is that the new constable?”

Why it works: It uses a slightly tweaked and expanded on the same joke idea, grounding it in a satirical fact that then sets up the original joke scenario. It’s a more evolved, self-contained piece of humor. The reference to the “new constable” provides a fresh twist on the “Hello” punchline.

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