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Category: Wife

What’s the difference between Outlaws and In laws?

Posted on August 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

Outlaws are wanted! Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on the provided joke: Joke Poo: What’s the difference between Octopuses and Politicians? Octopuses have eight arms to shake hands…

How to find your wife…

Posted on August 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

A man approached a very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and said, "I've lost my wife here in the supermarket." "Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?" The…

Small town gets a new cow

Posted on August 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

The only cow in a small town in USA stopped giving milk. The people did some research and found that they could buy a cow from BC Canada for 1,000 dollars, or…

A man comes home and finds his wife packing her things.

Posted on August 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

He asked what's going on. She says she's leaving him and moving to Las Vegas because she found out that she can make $500 a night as a prostitute. He then starts…

Joke my wife spontaneously came up with at dinner…

Posted on August 13, 2025 by Joke Poo

Me: The yellow tomatoes are harder to peel than the red ones. I think it’s because they have a thicker skin. Wife: Well they’d have to, since they’re always being teased about…

Division of labour in the Army

Posted on August 13, 2025 by Joke Poo

Three officers had a discussion in the mess tent. The captain said: Making love to the wife is fifty percent pleasure, fifty percent work. To which the major responded: I'd say it's…

Baby care

Posted on August 12, 2025 by Joke Poo

Found a manual on baby care and promptly gave it to my wife… she said – it’s all good, I think you’ve grown enough. Okay, here’s a new joke titled “Joke Poo”…

An ICE agent wakes up early…

Posted on August 12, 2025 by Joke Poo

He's getting dressed for work with his khaki pants, black shirt, vest, and mask when his wife wakes up and asks. "Why are you leaving so early?" He says, "I just want…

Husband to wife: “What would you if I won in the lottery?”

Posted on August 12, 2025 by Joke Poo

Wife: "I'll take half and leave you " Husband: "Well, I won $12. Here's six… keep in touch " Joke Poo: Programmer’s Legacy Programmer 1 to Programmer 2: “What would you do…

A woman became so disgusted with her husband she finally packed his bags and ordered him to get out.

Posted on August 12, 2025 by Joke Poo

While he's walking toward the door, she yells out at him, "I HOPE YOU DIE A SLOOOOW, PAINFUL, DEATH!!" He turns around, puts his stuff down, and says, "So, you want me…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • What is a landlord’s favorite kind of tea?
  • Fun puns.
  • My wife and I were discussing names for our newborn son when she asked if we could name him after her father.
  • What do you call a group of crows that are one short of a flock?
  • Sister Mary sat across the table from the mother superior.
  • Max and Pete are getting a haircut and shave at a barbershop.
  • An elderly Jewish man crashes his car into a tree. The paramedics arrive and use the jaws of life to extract him from the vehicle. They then put him on a stretcher, loosen his clothing to facilitate breathing, and cover him with a blanket.
  • “Push harder”, I shouted at my wife while she was in labor.
  • Two Irishmen were sitting at a pub having a pint, watching the brothel across the street.
  • After landing my new job as a Walmart greeter — a great gig for many retirees — I lasted less than a day.
  • How can you tell it isn’t Halloween yet?
  • I was chilling on the couch before work
  • One Hot Summer Day…
  • Another man goes to another doctor
  • Purple is my favorite color…
  • The punchline is the name of the site you are on.
  • Why do ghosts like to take the elevator?
  • A man goes to the doctor
  • Camel Brand Cigarettes
  • Do you ever wake up, kiss the person sleeping beside you and feel happy that you are alive?
  • A blonde goes ice fishing
  • A 60 Year billionaire marries a hot 25 Years old girl
  • A sheepdog returns to his farmer and says, “All right, I’ve got your 70 sheep back in the east pen.”
  • The Robot Interview
  • A man goes to a doctor
  • I shot someone with a starting gun the other day.
  • A new Navy recruit starts his first day on a submarine.
  • A married man spots a gorgeous woman in the supermarket and says, “Excuse me, I’ve lost my wife somewhere in these aisles… would you mind chatting with me for a bit?”
  • A young man walks into a pharmacy and asks for condoms…
  • An old lady goes to the doctor and says ‘doc, I can’t stop farting. They’re silent with no smell, but I’ve let out 20 in the past 5 minutes sitting here’
  • Girlfriend asked if she was fat so I proved my love in the most literal way
  • A blonde is overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet
  • What’s the scariest thing a gun toting, pegging enthusiast, broke ass girlfriend can say to you?
  • Yo mama’s so fat… whenever she went to the circus…
  • What’s the difference between a guy at a gay bar, a Type 2 diabetic, and a job applicant at a construction site?
  • Patient goes to doctor for test results.
  • A farmer was selling apple seeds that were supposed to make you smarter.
  • A man walks into a bar and orders a whiskey. He takes it outside to enjoy on the bench.
  • Two old friends run into each other on the street.
  • The burley gates of heaven
  • Did you hear about the price of chimneys these days?!
  • The Captain’s Red Shirt
  • Little Johnny’s neighbor
  • Horse
  • Your momma’s so fat…
  • I saw a dwarf climbing down a rope from a prison rooftop.
  • A Jewish woman came to her rabi, visibly upset.
  • Teacher asks Billy a math question
  • I find people can be so judgemental these days….
  • The butcher shop

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