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Category: Wife

A married couple claimed they never argued in their 25 years of marriage.

Posted on July 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

A married couple claimed they never argued in their 25 years of marriage. A friend asked, "How is that even possible?" The husband explained, "It all started during our honeymoon when we…

As the taxi raced towards the hospital, my wife cried “Don’t touch me! I can’t take the pain! I won’t make it! Don’t! CAN’T! WON’T!!”

Posted on July 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

"Hurry, driver!" I exclaimed. "Her contractions are getting closer together!" Joke Poo: The Coffee Order As the barista furiously steamed milk, the customer wailed, “Don’t touch me! I can’t take the foam!…

A boy turns to his grandfather and says “I bet you $20 I can put that earthworm back in the hole it just crawled from”

Posted on July 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

The grandfather laughs and says "the worm is much too wriggly and the hole is far too small, but sure, I'll take your bet". The boy runs inside the house and returns…

My wife says I never listen

Posted on July 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

… or something like that. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on the “My wife says I never listen…” joke: Joke Poo: My Dog’s Therapist My dog’s therapist says…

Dad shocked

Posted on July 16, 2025 by Joke Poo

One day my mother was out and my dad was in charge of me. I was maybe 2 1/2 years old and had just recovered from an accident. Someone had given me…

Free Sex with Fill-Up!

Posted on July 16, 2025 by Joke Poo

A petrol station owner in Ireland was trying to increase his sales, so he put up a sign that read, 'Free Sex with Fill-Up.' Liam pulled in, filled his tank and asked…

Three weeks after the wedding the wife is calling her mom sobbing over the phone.

Posted on July 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

“Mom, I don’t know what to do. We just had a huge fight.” “It’s perfectly normal, honey. All newlywed couples go through something like this. You just need to admit to your…

[NSFW] Sex On The Sabbath

Posted on July 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

A man wonders if having sex on the Sabbath is a sin because he is not sure if sex is work or pleasure. So he goes to a priest and asks for…

A Chinese man and woman gets married

Posted on July 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

As they go into the bedroom on their wedding night, the woman gets undressed and nervously gets under the sheets. "What's wrong?" the husband asks. The wife replies "I'm just nervous. This…

When I got married, I was always so incompetent about everything around the house.

Posted on July 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

Cleaning, gardening, mowing the lawn.Finally, my wife asked me, "Honey, why can't you do anything right? Why are you always so incompetent?" I told her the truth. I said, "Honey, it makes…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • A 60 Year billionaire marries a hot 25 Years old girl
  • A sheepdog returns to his farmer and says, “All right, I’ve got your 70 sheep back in the east pen.”
  • The Robot Interview
  • A man goes to a doctor
  • I shot someone with a starting gun the other day.
  • A new Navy recruit starts his first day on a submarine.
  • A married man spots a gorgeous woman in the supermarket and says, “Excuse me, I’ve lost my wife somewhere in these aisles… would you mind chatting with me for a bit?”
  • A young man walks into a pharmacy and asks for condoms…
  • An old lady goes to the doctor and says ‘doc, I can’t stop farting. They’re silent with no smell, but I’ve let out 20 in the past 5 minutes sitting here’
  • Girlfriend asked if she was fat so I proved my love in the most literal way
  • A blonde is overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet
  • What’s the scariest thing a gun toting, pegging enthusiast, broke ass girlfriend can say to you?
  • Yo mama’s so fat… whenever she went to the circus…
  • What’s the difference between a guy at a gay bar, a Type 2 diabetic, and a job applicant at a construction site?
  • Patient goes to doctor for test results.
  • A farmer was selling apple seeds that were supposed to make you smarter.
  • A man walks into a bar and orders a whiskey. He takes it outside to enjoy on the bench.
  • Two old friends run into each other on the street.
  • The burley gates of heaven
  • Did you hear about the price of chimneys these days?!
  • The Captain’s Red Shirt
  • Little Johnny’s neighbor
  • Horse
  • Your momma’s so fat…
  • I saw a dwarf climbing down a rope from a prison rooftop.
  • A Jewish woman came to her rabi, visibly upset.
  • Teacher asks Billy a math question
  • I find people can be so judgemental these days….
  • The butcher shop
  • September is Alzheimer’s awareness month
  • I saw a bison in the gym doing a workout the other day….
  • A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt.
  • Mexican Mayonnaise
  • I hate charging my electric car.
  • One day I called home and my kid answered. I asked where’s mom?
  • An old man comes to confession and says to the priest:
  • A Knock Knock Joke
  • What’s common between a testicular joke and testicular cancer?
  • A guy walks in a store looking to buy some beer
  • One afternoon, a teenage couple was on a hike in the woods.
  • Wish me luck, everyone! I have to meet with some people working at my bank in a few minutes. If all goes well I’ll pay off every debt I have, and still have enough to retire early.
  • A penguin was driving through a small town when his car broke down…
  • Not all construction tasks are equally enjoyable.
  • In a carpenter’s workshop, one apprentice makes a bet that he can recognize any type of wood just by its smell. They blindfold him and hand him the first board… the apprentice smells it confidently and says: “Oak!”
  • I was admitted into the hospital and as I settled into my bed, I overheard my “roommate” using the speakerphone to order breakfast from the cafeteria
  • My mom went on vacation to Florida
  • School year is like pregnancy.
  • A man visits his lawyer
  • A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer.
  • Election results are like group project grades

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