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Category: Wife

Single vulture dad problems

Posted on July 19, 2025 by Joke Poo

A vulture was flying back to his nest after a long day out looking for food. When he arrived, the nest was filthy and his son was snacking and playing video games….

A man tells his doctor …

Posted on July 18, 2025 by Joke Poo

A man tells his doctor that he’s incapable of doing all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination is over, he says, "Okay, Doctor. In plain…

A virgin young man meets a priest

Posted on July 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

A young man has been a virgin due to his strict parents. One day, he went to meet a priest and asked him about why his parents are like this. Priest: Why,…

A married couple claimed they never argued in their 25 years of marriage.

Posted on July 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

A married couple claimed they never argued in their 25 years of marriage. A friend asked, "How is that even possible?" The husband explained, "It all started during our honeymoon when we…

As the taxi raced towards the hospital, my wife cried “Don’t touch me! I can’t take the pain! I won’t make it! Don’t! CAN’T! WON’T!!”

Posted on July 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

"Hurry, driver!" I exclaimed. "Her contractions are getting closer together!" Joke Poo: The Coffee Order As the barista furiously steamed milk, the customer wailed, “Don’t touch me! I can’t take the foam!…

A boy turns to his grandfather and says “I bet you $20 I can put that earthworm back in the hole it just crawled from”

Posted on July 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

The grandfather laughs and says "the worm is much too wriggly and the hole is far too small, but sure, I'll take your bet". The boy runs inside the house and returns…

My wife says I never listen

Posted on July 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

… or something like that. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on the “My wife says I never listen…” joke: Joke Poo: My Dog’s Therapist My dog’s therapist says…

Dad shocked

Posted on July 16, 2025 by Joke Poo

One day my mother was out and my dad was in charge of me. I was maybe 2 1/2 years old and had just recovered from an accident. Someone had given me…

Free Sex with Fill-Up!

Posted on July 16, 2025 by Joke Poo

A petrol station owner in Ireland was trying to increase his sales, so he put up a sign that read, 'Free Sex with Fill-Up.' Liam pulled in, filled his tank and asked…

Three weeks after the wedding the wife is calling her mom sobbing over the phone.

Posted on July 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

“Mom, I don’t know what to do. We just had a huge fight.” “It’s perfectly normal, honey. All newlywed couples go through something like this. You just need to admit to your…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • I accidentally spilled a bottle of glue all over my vacation itinerary.
  • So after 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife went to see a therapist.
  • The Madam opened the brothel door in New York
  • The teacher asked little Johnny if he knew his numbers.
  • I just found out my wife has a twin sister.
  • Jesus and the old man…
  • What do you call a paper airplane that doesn’t fly?
  • A Wife Asks a Question to Her Husband
  • I bought a pack of biscuits, on the side it said, “Eat me big boy.”
  • What is a wok?
  • Racism exists in the oceanographic community.
  • Why are you right handed?
  • How does Lightning McQueen masturbate?
  • I recently found out they don’t have the real Mona Lisa in the Louvre
  • I saw a woman wearing short shorts that had a NASCAR logo.
  • A redneck had just been served in a Las Vegas cocktail lounge
  • An engineer wakes up in hell and thinks to himself. I’ve been a good person. I shouldn’t be here.
  • Two teenage church-goers get married.
  • As I walked into work this morning my colleague said, “Dave, you look like shit.”
  • A guy picks up a woman at a bar. After a couple of drinks they go to his place…
  • My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic..
  • The boss was confused when one of his most reliable employees didn’t show up for work.
  • A man is doing 20 over the speed limit on the highway when a cop pulls him over.
  • Accent misjudged
  • The speeding biker
  • My boss told me to have a good day…
  • Came up with this one while sitting in traffic: What’s a whiskey drinkers favorite car?
  • What do you call a cow with no legs?
  • An older couple were lying in bed one night.
  • At dinner, little Timmy was asked by his father to lead the prayer.
  • A joke I made up in third grade: How does a skunk protect himself from danger?
  • Captain Kirk. Peter Pan. Lestat De Lioncourt. Miss Marple. Don Draper. The Three Little Pigs. Robin Hood. Daffy Duck. Optimus Prime. Bilbo Baggins. Count Dracula. Han Solo. Jack and Diane. Elmo. Pikachu. Jean Valjean. Snow White.
  • A joke for reddit
  • A husband and wife were celebrating their 50th anniversary.
  • I said to the doctor “That haemorrhoid cream you prescribed for me is causing some unpleasant reactions”.
  • A woman hits a chicken as it’s crossing the road.
  • A 50yo Woman Goes in for Cancer Surgery
  • “Son, I found a condom in your room.”
  • Interviewer: “How much amount of milk does your cow produce?”. Farmer: “Which one, black one or white one?”
  • MENSA has started administering a new type of test that scans your social media posts determine your functional IQ.
  • A woman cheats on her husband
  • Hello, you have reached the Men’s Help Line, my name is Bob. How can I help you?
  • A man rubs a magic lamp, and a genie appears.
  • A Guy Meets An Actor
  • Frank and the Chili Cook off
  • On his first day at work, an apprentice butcher was ordered to chop up some rabbit carcasses for display in the shop window.
  • Why did the condom fly across the room?
  • When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue
  • “Pain” denotes the ache an Englishman feels
  • A Bishop, a Pope and Mother Superior are standing at the gates of Heaven.

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