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Category: Wife

My wife went deer hunting for the first time.

Posted on June 9, 2025 by Joke Poo

She said I go every year and she wanted to see what was so great that I kept coming back to hunt, year after year. I taught her how to operate and…

My wife asked if I would pick up 5 gallons of paint at the hardware store

Posted on June 8, 2025 by Joke Poo

I said – of course, that's on my bucket list Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" version of the paint joke, titled accordingly: Joke Poo My toddler asked if I…

A man and his wife were sitting in their living room one evening.

Posted on June 8, 2025 by Joke Poo

He said to her, "Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on a machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull…

In a small town there was a couple, known for being unafraid to express their love in a simple action.

Posted on June 8, 2025 by Joke Poo

A man and his wife were deeply in love, always holding hands, on the couch, on the bed, in public and in private. They expressed their feelings through this simple action for…

Prayer

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

The husband tells the wife that he is going to a 3-day church conference. Wife packs his bag, prepares breakfast for him and says, “Darling, let’s pray together before you leave.” Husband…

The CIA advertises for an assassin and three applicants, Tom, Dick and Harry, are chosen for a final test

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

Tom is given a gun and taken to a door. “Inside this room,” the CIA agent says, “you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Kill her!” Tom replies, “You can’t…

A woman is sitting at home, on the patio with her husband, drinking a glass of wine and she says, “I love you.”

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

He asks, "Is that you or the wine talking?" She replies, "It's me…talking to the wine." Joke Poo: The Compost Confession A gardener is kneeling in their vegetable patch, shoveling compost, when…

The perch problem

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

Man walks into a pet shop and sees a parrot for only $50. Standing next to the cage the man asks, "I wonder why he is so cheap?" "Because I am defective,"…

A widower goes to a psychic to contact his late wife. “Honey,” he says. “Are you happy?”

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

“Yes, my husband,” she says. Relieved, the man asks, “Are you happier than when you were with me?” “Yes, my husband,” she replies, “I’m much, much happier.” The husband smiles. “Heaven must…

Women are confusing. On my wife’s birthday, I wish her a Happy Birthday and she smiles happily at me

Posted on June 6, 2025 by Joke Poo

The following day I wish her a Happy After-birthday and she calls me a sick bastard. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" titled "Data’s Delicate Dance": Title: Data’s Delicate Dance…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • A Knock Knock Joke
  • What’s common between a testicular joke and testicular cancer?
  • A guy walks in a store looking to buy some beer
  • One afternoon, a teenage couple was on a hike in the woods.
  • Wish me luck, everyone! I have to meet with some people working at my bank in a few minutes. If all goes well I’ll pay off every debt I have, and still have enough to retire early.
  • A penguin was driving through a small town when his car broke down…
  • Not all construction tasks are equally enjoyable.
  • In a carpenter’s workshop, one apprentice makes a bet that he can recognize any type of wood just by its smell. They blindfold him and hand him the first board… the apprentice smells it confidently and says: “Oak!”
  • I was admitted into the hospital and as I settled into my bed, I overheard my “roommate” using the speakerphone to order breakfast from the cafeteria
  • My mom went on vacation to Florida
  • School year is like pregnancy.
  • A man visits his lawyer
  • A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer.
  • Election results are like group project grades
  • A librarian is having a discussion with a cobra…
  • Job interview question: Why ask for a high salary with no experience?
  • The other day I needed to pay a visit to a public toilet
  • A man doesn’t come home from work Friday, instead he spends the whole weekend out fishing with his buddies.
  • A hunter walks into a pub and says that he is the greatest hunter, he can recognize any game animal by its fur, and if they show him the wound, he can even tell which weapon killed it in exchange for a drink.
  • Guy : Doctor, my Girlfriend is pregnant but we always use protection and the rubber never broke. How is it possible?
  • (An original joke best read aloud) My friend got a job as one of those sushi girls. Y’know, where guys eat sushi off her naked.
  • What did the ghost of the Redditor say when looking at it’s own corpse?
  • What’s yellow and really hurts if it gets in your eye?
  • What a nice couple, how long have you been married?
  • Three cougars
  • Why did the BYU student come inside?
  • Reminder: terrorist jokes are tasteless and unfunny
  • Would make a joke about fencing
  • Possums are from the south
  • Did you know they just ruled dad jokes to be unconstitutional?
  • Boudreaux goes to the doctor
  • I called off work today when I saw the date
  • I hate people who take drugs
  • A very pregnant lady boarded a bus and noticed a young man smiling at her.
  • A gynecologist noticed his new patient was a little nervous.
  • The only two white actors in Black Panther are Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins, and Andy Serkis who played Gollum.
  • San Francisco, 1895. A man on the outskirts of town hires a cab driver to ride to the train station. No one wants to go that far, but one driver agrees.
  • A wife leaned into her husband and purred, “Have you ever seen twenty dollars all crumpled up?”
  • I promised my son…
  • Jogger sees fire
  • A salesman, Computer engineer and a system programmer
  • General Secretary Khrushchev and President Nixon met and started boasting about the greatness of their countries.
  • An American walks into a bar & orders a beer
  • A farmer’s son joins reddit and finds the r/Jokes subreddit
  • My Wife Always Gives 100% Sound Advice
  • A Caveman and a bear walk into a bar
  • I wrote a song about being naked.
  • Girlfriend needs a seat!
  • I’m So Old…
  • I’m surprised there’s not a lawn company called Paradise City…

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