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With tears in my eyes, I told my wife my dad had chosen me to gift his entire Encyclopedia Britannica audiobook collection.

Posted on May 28, 2025 by Joke Poo

She looked at me and said, ‘Wow… that really speaks volumes.

Joke Poo: The Compost Heap

With a sigh of despair, I told my toddler that Grandpa had bequeathed his entire collection of organic gardening books to me.

He looked at me with a thoughtful frown and said, "Well… that’s a growing problem."

Alright, let’s break down this joke and then build something new off of it.

Joke Deconstruction:

  • Setup: The setup is the speaker receiving their father’s Encyclopedia Britannica audiobook collection, framed in a dramatic "tears in my eyes" manner. This implies a large, perhaps burdensome gift.
  • Punchline: The wife’s response, "Wow… that really speaks volumes," is a pun. It plays on the double meaning of "volumes." Literally, an encyclopedia has many volumes. Figuratively, it means something is significant or telling. The wife is acknowledging both.
  • Humor Mechanism: The humor comes from the understated pun after the dramatic setup. It’s ironic because an audiobook doesn’t literally have volumes, but is still appropriately described in that way.

Key Elements:

  • Encyclopedia Britannica: A massive, historically significant general knowledge encyclopedia.
  • Audiobook: The audio version of the encyclopedia, adding a layer of anachronism (who listens to an encyclopedia audiobook?).
  • Pun: The core of the humor relies on the word "volumes".
  • Irony/Understatement: The wife’s reaction contrasts with the potentially dramatic setup.

Comedic Enrichment – Option 1: Enhanced Joke

With tears in my eyes, I told my wife my dad had chosen me to inherit his entire Encyclopedia Britannica audiobook collection. She looked at me and said, "Wow… that really speaks volumes. And I guess it also sounds volumes, since that’s all we’ll be hearing for the next decade. Did he at least get the abridged version read by someone interesting, like Gilbert Gottfried doing the entry on ornithology?"

Why this works: This adds another layer of humor by:

  • Extending the pun: Adding "sounds volumes" builds on the initial pun and highlights the impracticality of listening to such a lengthy audiobook.
  • Highlighting the absurdity: Suggesting Gilbert Gottfried reading ornithology is a wildly incongruous image, heightening the humor.
  • Implying boredom/tedium: Emphasizing the long-term commitment required to listen to the encyclopedia.

Comedic Enrichment – Option 2: Witty Observation/ "Did You Know"

Did you know that the Encyclopedia Britannica, in its various editions, has a long and complicated relationship with accuracy? For instance, in the 1911 edition, you could learn all about phrenology (the science of reading bumps on your head to determine personality), which is now considered complete hogwash. So, inheriting the audiobook version means you’re not just inheriting knowledge; you’re inheriting potentially outdated and hilariously wrong information delivered directly to your ears. Talk about a volume of questionable facts!

Why this works:

  • Connects to reality: Links the joke to the actual history and evolution of the encyclopedia.
  • Finds humor in inaccuracy: Points out the inherent comedic potential in outdated or inaccurate knowledge.
  • Reinforces the pun: A final "volume of questionable facts" ties back to the original joke.

Comedic Enrichment – Option 3: New Joke

My dad was so old-school, he believed in learning everything the hard way. When I asked him how he knew so much about obscure historical figures, he said, "Son, I listened to the Encyclopedia Britannica audiobook. Twice. Backwards. At half-speed. Now, tell me everything you know about the mating habits of the Patagonian Mara!"

I replied, "Dad, I just Googled it. It took 30 seconds."

He shook his head. "See? You young people have no patience for truly absorbing information. You’re missing the entire… volume… of the experience!"

Why this works:

  • Contrast between generations: Uses the encyclopedia audiobook as a symbol of a bygone era of in-depth learning versus the instant gratification of internet searches.
  • Exaggeration: The "twice, backwards, at half-speed" part is absurd, highlighting the father’s dedication.
  • Pokes fun at the "wisdom of elders": Subverts the idea that old-fashioned methods are superior to modern technology.
  • Returns to the pun: A knowing wink at the original joke with "missing the entire… volume… of the experience."

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