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A Man Is Invited To A Christmas Fancy Dress Party

Posted on November 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

He turns up wearing lingerie and nothing else. The host asks him "How is lingerie Christmas fancy dress?" "They're Carols" Joke Poo: A Dog Walker Goes to a Comic Con A dog…

You can’t trust people on Halloween anymore!

Posted on November 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

Gawd only knows what someone might actually put in your bag. Some idiot laced my drugs with candy. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on your Halloween joke: Joke…

What did the Catholic priest say to his disciple?

Posted on November 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

Nothing. You were misguided. Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version, titled appropriately: Joke Poo: What did the astronaut say to the eager rookie before their spacewalk? Nothing. Space cadets. Alright, let’s dissect…

The other day an old guy called about an Australian stick.

Posted on November 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

A boomer rang. Joke Poo: Title: Excrement Emergency The other day, a plumber got a frantic call about a clogged toilet. Turns out, it was poo-meranged. Alright, let’s dive into this pun-tastic…

The Queen, the Pope and Nelson Mandela walk into a bar

Posted on November 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

They start discussing forgiveness. – Once a tabloid wrote horrendous things about my family – says the Queen. – But I made sure they were not sued. One must rise above petty…

Good Christians should never use euphemisms for the toilet

Posted on November 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

It's an invitation to loo cipher. Okay, here’s my attempt at “Joke Poo” based on your original: Title: Chef’s Relief Experienced chefs should never use ambiguous terms for the walk-in freezer… It’s…

I went for a swim in France on a blowy day.

Posted on November 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

I was piscine in the wind. Okay, here’s a new joke, titled “Joke Poo”, that draws inspiration from your “I was piscine in the wind” joke, aiming for a similar kind of…

My masochist girlfriend said, “Choke me!”

Posted on November 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

I replied, "No, I don't think I will" Joke Poo: My overly polite AI companion said, “Analyze me!” I replied, “I’m afraid I can’t do that, Dave. It would be… inappropriate.” Okay,…

Ever wondered which service has the toughest troops?

Posted on November 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

An Air Commodore, an Admiral and a General are having a debate on a training ground. Now look here, chaps” says the Air Commodore, “my troops are as hard as they come;…

A doctor comes into the room, shaking his head at the clipboard in his hands, and tells the patient they’re being moved to the east wing.

Posted on November 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

"What's in the east wing?" the patient asks, while their bed is rolled down the hallway. "The morgue" replies the doctor. ".. but I'm not dead yet!" says the patient. "It's a…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • A Man Is Invited To A Christmas Fancy Dress Party
  • You can’t trust people on Halloween anymore!
  • What did the Catholic priest say to his disciple?
  • The other day an old guy called about an Australian stick.
  • The Queen, the Pope and Nelson Mandela walk into a bar
  • Good Christians should never use euphemisms for the toilet
  • I went for a swim in France on a blowy day.
  • My masochist girlfriend said, “Choke me!”
  • Ever wondered which service has the toughest troops?
  • A doctor comes into the room, shaking his head at the clipboard in his hands, and tells the patient they’re being moved to the east wing.
  • What do you call a ghosts poop?
  • I just brought a 2nd hand book about pasta.
  • Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
  • What dance did the cheese do at the Halloween party?
  • What happens when you’re late for a bris?
  • I’m getting tired of these trick or treaters this evening….
  • Patient: “Doctor! My stool is never solid!”
  • A truck carrying several rhesus moneys overturned.
  • The teacher said, “Steven why don’t you tell the rest of the class something you’re not very good at that begins with the letter N,”
  • Plumber at work
  • What do hillbillies do for Halloween?
  • Driving through the hills of Arkansas I noticed a large herd of cows grazing on a steep hillside pasture and thought
  • I was gonna tell a joke, but um…
  • Graveyard calling
  • What’s the easiest way to get in touch with your inner self??
  • For Halloween this year, I’m wearing pasties and a G-string
  • The singer in Roxette wouldn’t tell me her tennis score…
  • A detective rings the doorbell of an English mansion.
  • I asked my doctor about my prostate health and they gave me thumbs up
  • A  man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by.
  • Manager to his employee: “This is the 5th day in a row that you’re late to work. What conclusions should I make based on that?”
  • I was told that
  • Why don’t witches like winter?
  • I’m proud to say that I’m an award winning procrastinator.
  • What is the formal scientific term for what the adult film industry calls a “facial?”
  • A rope walked into a bar. . .
  • A popcorn vendor asks the customer whether he would like his popcorn sweet or salty… The customer gazes lovingly at his girlfriend and replies “I want it like her”
  • A fireman was working on the engine outside the station when he noticed a little girl nearby in a red wagon.
  • What do lice say when they feel they’ve overstayed their welcome?
  • Missing his son
  • How I want to die
  • Dirty lil’ Johnny.. (I hope its a new one)
  • The experimental surgery
  • Three men are captured by cannibals.
  • A castaway sees a ship, but watches it sinks, leaving one survivor in the water.
  • A man died and was met at the pearly gates of Heaven by St. Peter himself
  • Emergency Room
  • Why don’t violinists play hide-n-seek?
  • I don’t know if 6 is afraid of 7 anymore
  • Just turned 37…

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