Mother Superior gathers her novitiates (nuns in training)… MS: I have heard stories of some novitiates speaking in private with the gardener. Novitiates: Mama mia! MS: I have seen novitiates entering the…
Best names for a roomba
I named mine Floorence the Machine Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on the Roomba joke: Joke Poo: Best Names for a Smart Toilet I named mine John Wayne….
For years they’ve been saying “Think of the children”.
They sure changed their tune since the Epstein Files. Okay, here’s my attempt: Joke Poo: Think of the Alpacas For years, farmers have been saying “Think of the alpacas! They need shearing,…
You know you’re getting old when …
the noises you make getting off the couch sound exactly like the ones you used to make during sex. Joke Poo: Potty Training Edition Title: The Struggle is Real You know you’re…
Tired and thirsty
The Russian says, "I'm tired and thirsty. I must have vodka." The Frenchman says, "I'm tired and thirsty. I must have wine." The German says, "I'm tired and thirsty. I must have…
When I was a kid, I could go into a store with like a dollar and come out with a soda, a couple candy bars, some starbursts, some M&Ms…. But today?
It’s like there’s cameras everywhere. Joke Poo: The Compost Heap When I was a gnome, I could sneak into a farmer’s field with a handful of pebbles and come out with a…
Why was East German toilet paper so rough?
Because the Party wanted to make every asshole red. Joke Poo: Why are budget airline peanuts so small? Because they want to make every passenger nuts. Alright, let’s break down this East…
My son saw me slumped over our lawn mower, bawling my eyes out…
He screamed, "Dad! What's wrong!? Are you ok?!" I said, "Don't worry son, I'll be fine. I was just going through a rough patch…" Okay, here’s the Joke Poo version: Joke Poo:…
A man and his wife visited their doctor for a checkup.
The doctor wanted to examine the old man first. After examining him, the doctor said, "I'm surprised—you're in such excellent health!" The old man replied, "I attribute it to my good and…
There are 3 life stages to married sex:
A young married couple has “kitchen sex” and basically goes at it all over the house any time of day or night. At middle age they have “bedroom sex” once a week…